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Really mom? It's not *fair* for the kids and DH for me to stay the weekend out with some friends?

okay so my mother got wind that me and my best friend were planning a girls weekend. Sat afternoon to Sun afternoon in Feb. She tells me. 'It's that kind of unfair to the kids and to Charles (DH)?' What do you think. Is it unfair for me to go spend the weekend at her house where her kids are with their dad at g-ma's and few other friends who have left their kids with relatives also? Is it unfair to all their families to? For the record though my DH is fine with it. It's not like I do this every week or month or even every few months. It's once a year. If.

Dang we need a vent section...


Asked by But_Mommie at 7:50 AM on Jan. 23, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 44 (181,645 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (20)
  • I thought someone was writing about ME. This is EXACTLY what I am going through with my mom. I'm planning a weekend in march. I'm going to Austin (5 hours away). We have 2 working vehicles so if an emergency does happen he can take them to the doc or ER. I'm going on the weekend so dh doesn't have to worry about getting anyone to and from school. Dh himself has been pushing me to do this. I have not had more then 3 days away from the kids in over a year (When I gave birth to DD). Basically I have been home and kid bound for 8 years.

    Your mom needs to mind her business ( I say this respectfully). You, all moms, need a break here and there. Go for it mom and Have Sooooooooooo much fun!!

    Answer by 4xsthetrouble at 8:52 AM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • As long as your DH is ok with your getaway weekend. That is all that matters. that is what you should tell your mom. Themn tell her to go ask your DH how he feels about it. That should shut her up.

    Answer by louise2 at 7:53 AM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • You're mom is just jealous that she never did it back when she was raising you.
    Back in her time they didn't do those sorts of things...girls night/weekend out, woman's retreats.
    That's a thing of this generation.
    Go have's GOOD for you and your DH doesn't mind....even BETTER!

    Answer by Missikat75 at 7:56 AM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • Oh my goodness.. shame on you for asking you husband to BABYSIT his own children for 24 hours!!! What in the heck is wrong with you?!? LOL Kidding.. Seriously though.. time for mama to butt out =) I'm sure you deserve it and it's sweet that your hubby is giving you the break =) Enjoy

    Answer by Ctink8189 at 8:40 AM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • Couple of questions for you (lol - yes, I know some you answered in your post, but still...)

    1) Are you doing this every weekend, or even every month? 2) Are you going to be having sex with anyone? 3) Are you planning on doing a bunch of drugs, getting arrested, driving drunk, or anything else that could reasonably be considered ruining your life / causing a death, or ending up with you in prison, and separated from your family? 3) Is everyone else bringing their families except you? 4) Is one of your family members on their death bed? 5) Is your dh for some reason (in a coma or paralyzed) unable to care for the kids and himself? 6) Will this cause a financial hardship? 7) Is your mom going to have to watch them for you? 8) Are you going to Disney?

    If the answer to the above is no, then my answer is the same - no, it's not wrong, and no, it's not any of her business...

    Enjoy your time with your friends!

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 8:50 AM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • Are you kidding me? I do a girls weekend once or twice a year, it's wonderful for my mental health. :) It also gives my DH time to spend with the kids one-on-one. He encourages me to go, he knows I love them all deeply, but moms need some space too. I'm mad at your mom for you, if that helps :) Enjoy your weekend, and don't give her ignorant comments a second thought.

    Answer by Scuba at 7:52 AM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • Your mom needs to butt out if it's okay with your DH. Jeepers. Yes, it's fantastic for you (and the kids and DH) to get a refreshing weekend away to laugh, play, re-energize and connect with other people. Go and have fun.

    Answer by amybaby_19 at 7:52 AM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • some moms just don't do that. they don't think it's right for them and their dh to even go out without the kids! it's very weird IMO. there are actually moms out there that haven't had a real date night with their hubby since the kids were born. they take the kids with them. they don't even have their own time to themselves, let alone a girls night, or even weekend.

    I'm not very understanding of this. I like to have a time and place where i don't have to talk about the kids. to me, if i wrap myself around the kids where i do EVERYTHING with them, once they're out of the house, i'm not going to have anything else to talk about, and dh and i would probly drift apart. not only that, but girl time is very important too. so is me time. i try to have me time at least once a month, girl time is like, 2 or 3 times a year though. dh has "guy" time when they go out muddin and stuff in the mountains. sometimes you need a break!

    Answer by armywife43 at 8:34 AM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • Your mom is not right. First of all, they are with their dad. And you are going for a day. So I guess my one friend who has a yearly training for work that is 4 days out of town, that is unfair to her kids.....oh wait, she has to work to pay bills. Your mom needs to get a grip LOL Just go. It's not her business unless she was the one you wanted to watch your kids.

    Answer by 2BlondeBabies at 7:55 AM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • I have a weekend with the girls once a year- Friday morning to Saturday night. Last year, I had a 2nd one where I was gone 3 days. I see nothing wrong with an occasional weekend with the girls.

    Answer by rebeccasmly at 8:06 AM on Jan. 23, 2011