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Some very rude, nasty woman told me that she claims several of you women on here are saying that you wouldn't be interested in adopting my unborn baby without doing a full background check on me, and further more that a lot of you are branding me as a scammer, due to the fact that I will NOT allow a background check on myself nor my family, is this true? Misty Sanders

Please email me at for your answers to what this woman is claiming that a lot of you ladies are saying about me, whom only a few women on here I've even spoken with. Thanks ladies


Asked by Misty42977 at 4:45 PM on Jul. 7, 2008 in Adoption

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Answers (6)
  • p.s. I'm sorry that rude nasty woman upset you. Giving up a child isn't an easy thing to do. You need moral support not someone accusing you of scamming ppl. Your background is your business and no one else's. Good luck. I'm sure you will find the right loving parents for your child. There are many good adoptions agencies. Call one of them and tell them you do not want a background check done.

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:44 PM on Jul. 7, 2008

  • I'm not one of them, but unless you have some serious issues in your past, like mental illiness or drug addiction LET them do a background check on you, and YOU do the same to them as you will want to make sure you give your baby to a "good" couple. If I was adopting a child outside the agencies, I would insist on a BG check because I would not want a child from a drug addicted mother or one who is in and out of a mental institution. Raising a child is expensive enough without adopting one you thought would be healthy and turned out to be severly in need of serious medical attention for life. It's one thing to give birth to a special needs baby. Quite another to adopt on when you could have avoided it.

    Answer by vbruno at 7:01 PM on Jul. 7, 2008

  • Certainly your desire to not have a background check done on you should be respected. As a matter of fact when my dd adopted her child out the background check was on the adoptive parents NOT on her or the bd. I'm not understanding the need for a background check on you anyway. If there are any medical issues in the family of course those should be passed on to the prospective parents but your right to privacy is of the utmost importance as well.

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:41 PM on Jul. 7, 2008

  • the only thing i would wanna know about is medical history for future medical referances incase anything happened with the baby and they'd need to know if it was genetic... other then that your life if your life and I wouldn't need to know if you got a speeding ticket when you were 16.

    Answer by Ambreelulu at 8:30 PM on Jul. 7, 2008

  • Even if you or your family did have mental or physical disease in your history, who doesn't? It is just good to know.

    Answer by TXdanielly at 11:51 PM on Jul. 7, 2008

  • I'm the one who initially asked this question. I appreciate all of your responses, and no, there's absolutely NO mental illness, physical problems,etc which would merit a check. This woman was insisting on doing a background check on myself and my entire family. And said that a lot of women on here were calling me a scammer, because I wouldn't allow her to do a background check, because it's none of her damn business. Thanks again ladies for all of your support:)

    Answer by Misty42977 at 12:45 AM on Jul. 8, 2008