Dh and I had an argument about the same subject yet again. It never gets resolved. Just put on the back burner. When I bring it up dh says, "Damn we on this again. Thought we already talked about this." YES we did TALK about it, but it was NEVER DEALT WITH.
The problem is Dh was two stepping. One minute he's excited that I am going back to school, but then he adds a dumb ass comment. "When you get your degree don't forget about home. You got a husband and kids. If you gon be working like a hog at least call and order dinner. Don't forget to take care of home." Um okay.
Dh is only one bringing in an income. I rarely ever spend money on myself. I just bought a new shirt, pants, and 2 pairs of shoes (totaling 36.00) 2 weeks ago. The last time I bought new clothes? It was a shirt when I was pregnant with DD ( a year ago). I take care of the household. I make sure everyone else is taken care of.
Anyway, there are things that dh does not do that I THOUGHT he should be doing. I THOUGHT that because we laid down and had kids together that he would share in the diaper changing, the feedings, the discipline , etc..
Wrong. Dh has left kids in poopy diapers while I slept, or while I was out at the store. He won't change a diaper. Giving the baby a bath..no. Making the kids clean up after themselves..no.
He wants a wife who works and takes care of his and the kids every need.
Ladies I am tired. I have been doing this since before I had my own kids. I raised my little brother and sister. I have been dealing with babies/kids since I was 10. He knows this.
When I bring it up(his not helping), he tells me, "For thousands of years the man went out and worked and the woman stayed home taking care of the kids and the house. Thats just how it is."
Okay fine. But let me get this straight. You want me to go to school, get a job and bring in another paycheck (which i'm cool with), then you also want me to take care of you and the kids and the house? But when I tell YOU to practice what you preach you tell me thats not right? How is it okay for you to treat me like a mule but it's not okay for you to be treated this way?
I'm close to snapping. I'm still going to go to school. Because I honestly do not believe my marriage is going to last much longer and I want to be able to provide for my children when he and I split.
Am I wrong to feel so, just lost, and angry and sad?
Asked by Anonymous at 2:57 PM on Jan. 23, 2011 in Relationships
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