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2 Bumps

How much harder are two children than one??

My husband and I are deciding weather to have a second child. I'm am currently a SAHM and plan to be for roughly the next 4 years while I go back to school (College online...not high school.. just thought I'd clarify you never know these days. ) Any way our Daughter is 14 months and we are talking about trying this summer. I know it is probably a dumb question but on a scale of 1 to 10 how much harder are two children than one?? Or once you have the one does the next one just fall into routine??


Asked by Anon344 at 10:57 PM on Jan. 23, 2011 in General Parenting

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Answers (12)
  • I told myself from the very beginning "I can do this, we will find a good routine, and everything will be fine". When our daughter was born I found a good routine that worked for our schedule and the whole family adjusted really well. Sure, there are moments when you're beyond exhausted, cranky, emotional, or just plain worn down. However, overall it can be really easy if you allow it to be. You have to find that routine that works for the whole family. Luckily my kids napped at the same time from the beginning, so I never had to adjust anyone's sleeping schedule. My daughter only woke once a night to feed, so I got enough sleep. I know not everyone's experience is as effortless, but just like life in general it is all what you make of it. If you put too much work into something simple it'll be hard. If you just go with the flow and figure it out as it comes it'll be easy.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 11:44 PM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • I'd go with a 10. Haha but that is just me. I thought transitioning to having 2 children was just as hard as going from none to one. Your new baby is not going to "fall into your routine" it is going to completely ruin your routine! My boys are almost exactly 2 years apart and if I was to do it again I would wait 3-4 years so the older is much more independent. Also, I got pregnant when my oldest was 15 months and was throwing up nonstop for the first three months. I pretty much missed 3 months of my little guys life... =/ WAIT! =)

    Answer by TreseLapish at 11:03 PM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • Not in my experience do they follow the routine. This is because they are two different people. Mine are both boys, which helps, 18 months apart. I think it's more work, simply put. Change two sets of diapers, feed two, buckle two in the car and load and unload, juggle two at the store and doctor, etc. Two get sick. For us, it's more work. I'm happy to do it but it's work!

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 10:59 PM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • double the responsibilities

    Answer by hellokitty1978 at 10:59 PM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • It's rough at first, especially if you have a routine with your dd already. When I had my second, my ds had a huge problem adjusting to bedtime bc I would be nursing our dd and so my hubby had to help. After about a month or so, thing became a lot easier. Now, thinkin back, 1 was sooooo easy!! (( ds was 18 months when we has our dd))

    Answer by BabyBugsmama at 11:01 PM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • For the love of GOD .. DON'T DO IT!!!!They suck the life out of you.JK

    Answer by FreeFall at 11:03 PM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • Ours were 20 months apart. It wasn't easy but it wasn't horrific for me. Probably because in addition to being the first, my oldest was had pretty severe reflux and a dairy allergy in a time when it wasn't recognized that reflux was possible in infants. It took a full 6 months for the doctors to listen to me, and even after that the kid never slept. He was pretty accepting when DD was born. And she was the exact opposite. She was a happy spitter and slept. It made things a lot easier.

    Answer by balagan_imma at 11:06 PM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • I didn't think it wa that much harder at all with two. My oldest was 2 1/2 years when our second was born. Our oldest has a great personality and attitude she listens very good and does what shes told which made it alot easier also. She was also a very big help and never got jealous or anything.

    Answer by dominique1108 at 11:08 PM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • I had my 2 girls 5 yrs apart. I wanted to give the time and attention to the 5yr old before we had another child. Then we felt we could also give the baby the time and attention she needed having them 5 yrs apart. worked out great for us all the way around.

    Answer by MyAngel003 at 11:28 PM on Jan. 23, 2011

  • I honestly didn't think that it was that hard at all. I was tired quite a bit for the first month until the new baby was sleeping all night but other than that it was great. My boys are 13 months apart and my dd came 20 months after son #2. I think it depends all on your personality and the personality of your children. I am a very laid back, easy going person. Ds #1 is also very easy going. When we brought the new baby home it was no big deal, things did just fall into place. Ds #2 is a little more high strung and emotional. It took him a little time when we brought their sister home but he was also used to our lifestyle of going with the flow and again things just fell into place. I also am a sahm. I think it would have been a lot harder if I was working full time, even part time.

    Answer by JamieLK at 11:34 PM on Jan. 23, 2011