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Does it make me a bad mom?

I can see this is a touchy subject ....I'm new on here....one thing i noticed is how critical people are about people who smoke. I am a smoking pregnant woman...I am 19 yrs. old ...I lost my mom a couple of months ago to cancer...so reason enough for me to quit right? I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, still thing's are hard...my babys already been through enough stress and I've cut down to like 5 smokes a day but does this really make me a bad mom because I'm trying all I can to keep myself and my son healthy! I really want honest answers cause you know caffeine is bad but I bet alot of moms didn't interfere their habits of coffee drinking and mt.dew spews while they were pregnant but they are WONDERFUL moms cause they didn't smoke? Well I should be a wonderful Mom cause I don't do hardcore drugs to help me deal with the loss of my mom ...right? Just trying to make a point.

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PinkWarrior

Asked by PinkWarrior at 12:27 AM on Nov. 14, 2008 in Pregnancy

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (19)
  • sweetie, smoking does NOT make you a bad mother!!!! yes there are judgmental people out there that will tell you you are evil and rotten etc. DON'T LISTEN TO THEM

    While I was pregnant, my doctor actually told me that if quiting was causing to much stress for me, then don't quit. She told me that much stress was worse than smoking.

    I also drank pepsi and coffee while pregnant. :) it's recommended that you keep caffeine intake under 300 mg a day, a 20 oz pepsi has 63 mg. 2 20oz would last a full day for me, so I was within limits :)
    flutterfae

    Answer by flutterfae at 12:31 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • You are not a bad mom. You care about your baby. You are a troubled mom and maybe telling your doctor what is up is a good idea. Your doctor, if good, will help guide you and give you more information besides scaring the crap out of you.

    You have issues that you need to deal with. It is not wrong to ask for help. Also if the doctor knows what is up, he/she may want to monitor the baby closer.

    Take care!
    girlneffy

    Answer by girlneffy at 12:32 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • no it doesnt and even drs will tell you that you should quit slowly because if you just stop then you go back to it from withdralws then it could be worse for baby .. it does not make you a bad mom but alot of dumb people will say yes it does
    iloveyall2008

    Answer by iloveyall2008 at 12:34 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • You are not a bad Mom. Should you smoke, no, but as you pointed out, these habits, etc. are hard to give up-- esp. in stressful times. It is good that you have cut way back. Keep it as low as you can. Don't let anyone beat you up, you are trying your best and noone has the right to be your judge. You only answer to God! Just, please, after the baby is born, be diligent about not smoking around him/her. That is actually worse than smoking while pregnant. I'm so sorry for your loss! I can't imagine how difficult that must be to be so young, pregnant, and not to have your mom! I'll say a prayer for you!

    Mishelly728

    Answer by Mishelly728 at 12:35 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Nope not a bad mom; I am also a pregnant smoker... I smoke a heck of a lot less than what i would typically smoke; but I still smoke nonetheless. I did cut out my caffeine intake to one soda day; and no more coffee. I drink water which I hate, but I do it anyway. I take my vitamins and try to each healthy per a diabetic diet so that way I don't go too overboard even with my cravings. It's hard to be a mom, and a wife, and a cook, and a maid, etc etc. Be glad you are able to do what you have, if smoking 5 cigarettes gets you through it all (to include the death of your mom, rest in peace,) then so be it. You are still a #1 Mommy in my book!
    leoangel

    Answer by leoangel at 12:37 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Im a 27 year old mom of four kids pregnant with the fifth. I smoked while i was pregnant with all of them.If there is one thing ive learned its everyone will judge you for everything you do.Ive learned to stop caring what others think cause the only persons opinion that matters now is my kids.
    I breastfeed all of them to.You would not believe the looks and comments ive gotten because of this,but i still did it.Your kids will think your a great mom as long as you love,hug ,kiss and take care of them.forget what everyone else thinks.
    Nikki_91510

    Answer by Nikki_91510 at 12:38 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • WOW I guess alot of the negative people are in bed already! You got lucky on that one. LMAO
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:39 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • lol i agree annoymous lol ... she is a very lucky girl lol
    iloveyall2008

    Answer by iloveyall2008 at 12:44 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Pink, that is heartbreaking, and I definitely will! I'm sure you will do a good job of keeping their grandma alive in their hearts through your love and memories of her!

    Mishelly728

    Answer by Mishelly728 at 12:45 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • caffeine is not really that harmful u can have a little and its fine but all smoking is bad. i dont want to judge u and call u a bad mom but u really should quit at least until delivery and then dont do it around the baby
    Butterflysky_24

    Answer by Butterflysky_24 at 12:49 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

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