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Breaking from the binky

My son will be 3 in June. And he still has his binky. I have tried numerous times to take it from him, but he is super attached to it. He will not sleep with out it, he'll sit in his room and cry until he gets it back, he wont eat, nothing. And I mean at all, not just for a few hours. Im talking whole days. Its exhausting. My friends all say theyre kids werent near as hard to break from it as him. He's never been through any tragic incidents or anything. I dont know why he doesnt want to go off it. But Im getting kind of worried about it. What should I do?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:45 PM on Jan. 24, 2011 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (10)
  • If you keep giving it back to him after trying to take it away then of course he's going to cry b/c he knows you'll give in. I would stick to your guns and take it away. He will eat when he's hungry and he's not going to stay away for days. He's testing you.

    Answer by genagina at 4:46 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • *Stay awake I mean. Good luck to you!

    Answer by genagina at 4:47 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • I agree with genagina, you need to stick to your guns no matter how stressful or tiring it is. He knows that you will give in, so he will do whatever it takes to get you to give it back to him. He will eat when he is hungry, he is just testing you. You are the parent and what you say goes!

    Answer by NAT24ROXY24 at 4:54 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • Is a binky a pacifier. My granddaugher has a little blanket that we call her beeky. She is four and we are not trying to take it away. She only uses it at home. She goes to preschool without it.
    Perhaps your little one will give it up when he goes to preschool, because he will want to big like the other big kids.

    Answer by tootoobusy at 4:57 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • Binkys a pacifier tootoo.

    Answer by genagina at 4:58 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • he's going to cry, and its going to pull at your heart strings. But at a time when life is calm, and if he's up crying half the night it won't effect your next day because there are no plans, you have a big talk about a right of passage, moving from baby to big boy. You and your son throw away ever single binki in the house, all of them (if it makes you feel better keep 1 but don't let him know). Offer him some other comforting item, a blanket, stuffed animal, for my friend's son it was her shirt. He wanted to sleep with her shirt after he got rid of his binki's. Whatever the replacement item is make sure its readily available, and then immediately take out the trash. Offer the new comfort item when he cries for the binki and remind him he is a big boy now, not a baby. Tell everyone everywhere you go what a big boy he is now. Give it a good week, and if he's still not eating and sleeping to the point you're concerned...

    Answer by ba13ygrl1987 at 5:10 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • call his pediatrician and ask if there's health concerns with letting him have it a little longer. That binki is his comfort item, it makes him feel safe and that's why he's so attached. My son has a stuffed tigger and at 5 still takes it to school in his book bag. It stays in the bag, but I could never take tigger away. My son wouldn't function. It'll probably go to college with him in a box, no joke. So if after a week your son is still that sad over it being gone talk to his Dr. GL

    Answer by ba13ygrl1987 at 5:12 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • Have you noticed that every time you try to take it away, it reinforces his desire to hold onto it?

    I wrote a blog post on this subject:

    You have given a young child a method of self-soothing, and now *you* are finished with him needing soothing? Why? Has he given you any indication that he's finished needing soothing?

    There is no dental impact from even really aggressive sucking until the child is over 5.

    Answer by LindaClement at 5:21 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • I took it away at 18 month. My son was sick with a cold and really could not suck on it. so I just never gave it back. He found random ones here and there, that I didn't even know were missing, and would put them in and I just took it out and out it in my pocket not making a big deal out of it.

    Answer by stephgood1 at 10:27 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • I am going to do the exact same thing as I did with the bottle. My daughter is 16 months, I am taking hers away the beginning of February. I am just taking them and throwing them in the garbage. No special ways of doing it! Just take the darn thing away is my motto!! lol If you have spares you will break down and give in.. Sure it will be hell at first, but they will forget about it, and find other coping skills when needed~

    Answer by ali_1107 at 6:09 AM on Jan. 25, 2011

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