Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Past sexual relationships?!?!

Do you think that you DH or SO should know about your past sexual relationships?

My DH and I just got in an argument because I was talking to my single best friend who had had her first one night stand last weekend, and my DH overheard our conversation....kinda. He herd me say "ya, I have had one of those once". He thought I ment STD, and I promised him that I have NEVER had one. So I told him what I was talking about had to do with my past sexual relationship and that it was none of his buisness. I told him that it had nothing to do with our relationship and that I did not want to talk about it because it would only cause problems. (he is extermely jealous type). And now he is throwing a tantrum over it, but I know if I say something about it he will just flip out anyways.

What would you do?


Asked by Anonymous at 6:51 PM on Jan. 24, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (23)
  • My past relationships helped me become who I am today and I have no shame in that. I wish my husband would realize this. Who bloody cares if you've had sex in the past? When you discuss it behind closed doors, it sounds sneaky. Even when it's not, I don't know. You have a healthy past, thank the good lord above! Lol!

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 7:00 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • How would you feel if he was keeping a whole list of sexual history from you?

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 7:02 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • Well if he's sleeping with you he has every right to know about your sexual history. My husband knows all about my past. We don't keep things from each other.

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 6:53 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • tell him you were talking about blow jobs
    then give him a great one when he calms down ...if he clams down-lol

    Answer by fiatpax at 6:59 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • Sorry this is happening. From your other comments I hope you think things through. This will only get worse as time goes on. Maybe you should reconsider being with him.

    Answer by elizabr at 7:49 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • I would just tell him.. If he started flipping out i would end up saying an ass of a comment like.. if you cant handle the truth, dont ask the question.

    Answer by goodfriendeva at 8:10 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • I can understand where you're coming from being that he's the jealous nature. However, I still think that you went about it the wrong way. "It's none of your business and I'm not going to tell you about it." to me would say "I'm hiding something from you." I wouldn't be okay with that knowing that there is something there that DH isn't willing to tell me. We're married he should want to tell me everything good or bad. Now, he's not obligated in any way to divuldge his past to me, but to help build trust and understanding I think it's important to know about one's past. DH and I have shared all we can remember or whatever has come up in conversation. We don't feel the need to hide things from one another. Sure some topics have caused a little tension and maybe caused a fight or two, but without sharing you can't really know your spouse. You have to know everything to know them.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 8:12 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • Your past is YOUR past. You dont have to share anything about it that you dont want to especially if he will overreact or be more jealous. Im sure there are things he hasnt shared with you. My dh has never asked me about anything like that.

    Answer by okmommy08 at 6:55 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • Ok if you do not want the man you married knowing your past then do not have conservation with someone when he is around. He is wrong for acting like a kid but you must admit that your past has something to do with him. You might not want to go into imtimate details for that is not something he seem to be able to handle but you might need to reassure that you did not have STD's. I told my husband all about the people I slept with before him but not details. He did the same thing but I do not keep anyhthing from him because a strong marriage has no secrets .

    Answer by karing4elmas at 7:00 PM on Jan. 24, 2011

  • assuming he knows you were not a virgin before him

    also add... you never liked giving blow jobs at all until you meet him
    he will eat this up
    tell him, you do not know why yopu never liked it, maybe it is because you never loved anyone close to how you feel about him

    maybe a little white lie with a huge stroke of his male insecure ego will help

    Answer by fiatpax at 7:01 PM on Jan. 24, 2011