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How can we get my niece to see that something is wrong with her child?

He is almost 3, doesn't say but very few words. When he gets hurt or scolded he runs to a corner & screams & flaps his hands. He is very hyper, & will not look at you or come to you when you call his name. We think it may be Autism!


Asked by NCBec at 3:24 AM on Jan. 25, 2011 in Kids' Health

Level 7 (160 Credits)
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Answers (18)
  • We went through a similar thing w/ someone in our family. They were actually told by their doctor that the child would grow out of it - but, of course, he didn't. Fortunately he finally got intervention in preschool and is doing much much better. They still haven't said anything but he is clearly on the autism spectrum.

    Does she ever say anything about his behavior? Maybe she just doesn't realize that there is a problem. If you are going to talk to her, make sure you let her know how much you love her son, how wonderful you think he is and that you're just worried about the speech delays. Maybe if you come to her with some resources she'd be willing to look into it. But I would focus only on the speech delay & that may at least get her in to see someone who can make a diagnosis.

    Answer by sweetpotato418 at 7:27 AM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • That does sound like autism. I suggest showing your neice the signs of autism and showing her what a child of that age should be doing. Tell her that early intervention helps tremendously!!!!

    Answer by SweetLoveofMine at 3:27 AM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • I would get info on autism and delayed speech for her to review. she may be in denial, thats a very delicate subject when its your child. Also I would find out if she has been getting his regular check ups with a doctor. They will be able to help her understand what milestones in development he should be at.

    Answer by peanutbuttasmom at 4:12 AM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • Get a video about autism and watch it with her and see if she let's it sink in. Something needs to be done to prevent further loss.

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 4:20 AM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • Well, first of all, I wouldn't start out the conversation with words such as "something is wrong with your child".  I would tell her that you are a member of Cafemom and that her child has a lot of the symptoms that you hear on here from other moms.  I would maybe (if I had a printer hooked to my computer) print out some information on the signs of autism and show them to her.


    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 5:15 AM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • Well u can't leave her alone too long...the child would continue to be without help. They are in my prayers!

    Answer by QueenAdeela at 3:40 AM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • Does the child go in for regular pediatric checkups? You might ask if she has asked her doctor for any ideas as to why he doesn't make eye contact and start with just one question to get the conversation going.

    Answer by elizabr at 7:05 AM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • you can try anyway you like, but you ARE going to piss her off if you butt in. Just be prepared for her to be mad at you if you cant leave it alone.

    Answer by LuvMyMedic3ID at 5:33 AM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • God bless you for being sweet enough to want to help. Ya, I get that it's a very sensitive subject but if you think this child really needs help now, you could send her an anonymous letter maybe? I'm assuming that you either don't want to talk to her about it (akward) or already have. I wouldn't worry too much, b/c once he goes to school or preschool it will be addressed. Good luck

    Answer by JackieGirl007 at 7:37 AM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • Give lots of literature about it. Hopefully she will read it and act now! If not, they will catch it in school when he begins. You can also contact your local autism society and ask for advice there on how to talk with her. Although no one wants to hear "I think your child has autism", I wish I had had an aunt like you to talk with me! I knew something was up with my ds but everyone dismissed me (oh, he's fine, boys are slower type comments). He was 6 when diagnosed. We missed years of therapy, don't give up on getting through to your niece!

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 8:22 AM on Jan. 25, 2011