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Help Please My son is in trouble he is autistic and in Jail. I need to talk to someone. Please.

This question is on going, My son is autistic pervasive developmental disorder, My son has been in jail for a week now, in jail for driving without a license I went to court his lawyer got him another week in jail plus he has to pay all his fines? we he and I are disabled and have not got any money? the judge said that if he doesn't pay his fine they will add more fines. I feel trapped and so does my son how can he pay this? and he is out, but the judge said if he drives again he will go for a year but my lawyer said that there was no probation. I don't know how to stop him? he thinks he is invincible. And considering only being in jail for two weeks, I am afraid he hasn't learned his lesson. I am desperate to solve this problem my son is on ssi so am I, he is mentaly disabled I am physically disabled.

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Asked by Starseed at 8:35 AM on Nov. 14, 2008 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • I don't have any advice for you but i'll talk to you if you want me too.. Pm me!!

    Answer by honeys_sugamama at 8:42 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Take away any access to a car

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:51 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Send a letter with whatever payment on the fine you can make. In the letter state that he is on SSI and does not have the money or ability to make any more than what he has. Pay something even if it is only 2 dollars. Then send two dollars or 5 or however much he can every single month with a copy of the same letter until the fines are paid. Good effort can go a long way. Or sell something and pay the fine, like maybe the car he is driving.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:24 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • In reading your post I felt pain and maybe fear. Are you afraid to take the keys and or car away from your son? If so please tell the attorney and advise him you need help. Im so sorry your under this stress, and remember this is your sons mistake not yours and he will have to face the fact one way or the other. Im not trying to hurt you and and sorry if it comes across as harsh but you need to get help now and get it quick. Is your son able to get a valid drivers liscense? If not then your only choice is to take the keys and car away. Contact family for help if you can. Feel free to chat anytime. God Bless you and your both in my prayers.

    Answer by tramar47 at 10:55 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Since he's getting SSI, he needs to be aware that he can lose his benefits if he goes to jail. FACT. Besides, he is too vulnerable for a jail in the first place! I cannot BELIEVE a judge, knowing his dx sent him there!! How horrible! Is there a Mental Health Court near you? Send in that 2 bucks as someone else said above; it buys you time for now. Did you know his benefits might increase actually if he lives elsewhere, like a group home, per SSA's different definitions of living arrangements? If his dx is severe enough, you could become his guardian again, too. His chronological age is irrelevant with autism, as I'm sure you know. Write me anytime. :-) I'm also physically disabled. To make a long story short, it's how & why I came to be a SS Disability Advocate. GRIN - my partner (an attorney) and I know where 'they' hide the money to help people in need! Our prayers are with you and your son.

    Answer by MacMomAK at 10:40 AM on Nov. 15, 2008

  • Well, on a practical level do everything you can to eliminate his access to a car if he doesn't have a license. Make arrangements with the court to pay off the fine in increments if you need to. Many people do pay off their fines that way when they can't afford to pay in full. Regular payment usually work out okay but try not to miss any. Without knowing your son it is hard to think of suggestions to help him understand, but I think his time in jail is a concrete example of what can happen if he drives without a license. Can you continue to talk to him about the consequences? Who does the car belong to...?

    Answer by BJoan at 4:06 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • I have never been in that situation.but there has to be somekind of Austistic organization in your area.I'm sure they could give you good advice on how to handle this.I hope your son gets the help he needs to have a happy productive life.

    Answer by evelynwest at 2:55 PM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • if your son is mentally impaired, why is he driving? that is so dangerous. for himself and others.

    Answer by confused193 at 6:32 PM on Nov. 19, 2008

  • My son is also in jail for driving on suspended/revoked. But this is the ninth time. If this was your son's first offense or even second offense then he should be able to get probation. I don't know what your attorney is talking about. I don't think your son would have to serve a year if he doesn't have a bad backround. A one year sentence means that your son would have to serve 61 days in a state prison. But still your son would have to serve 60 days or 90 days before he should have to serve a one year sentence. He should be eligible for community service or something before going to the penitentiary. Maybe you should go to your state's criminal justice website and get as much information that you can, because sometimes the courts and attorneys think that the less you know the less the workfload is on them and they will not really try to get the correct answers.

    Answer by msmac417 at 4:18 PM on Dec. 7, 2008

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