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17 Bumps

When did it become cool to be friends with your kids not parents?

I have noticed an increase of parents who are more concerned with being their kids friends then the mentor to guide them on the right path. I am shocked to hear studies in the news about parents being cussed out by parents or kids telling their parents what to do. I think I fell asleep and the world changed . When I was growing up cursing was not allowed but no way in front of any adult. I know that the Internet is big in kids lives but when will parents take back their positions as parents and not peers.

If you work a full time job and still do all the chores in your house.

If your child get bad grades and has a bad attitude yet still has all the newest games and  clothing.

If your under age child live in your home be speak to you as if you are their child.

PLEASE BUMP IF YOU AGREE.

Answer Question
 
karing4elmas

Asked by karing4elmas at 3:55 PM on Jan. 25, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Level 18 (6,210 Credits)
Answers (30)
  • I don't know. I am not my son's friend, I am his mother and he knows that. But, he can come to me and talk to me about anything.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 3:56 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • I am cool with parents like you @tyfry7496 but I see too many kids screaming at their parents with no fear job, or education. Parents taking it and then having to deal with life and unruly kids too . I am not going to take that from my kids or family's kids.
    karing4elmas

    Comment by karing4elmas (original poster) at 3:58 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • I will not be my kids friends until they are grown adults living on their own. They have tons of friends but only one mother. But I will say that they always know that they can come to me first, over anyone else, when they need to talk or need advice about anything.
    shanlaree

    Answer by shanlaree at 3:59 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • I don't get it either. Every time I hear a question here about how their kid doesn't like them or how they are best friends with their kids (meaning literally a best friend) I just cringe. I have no interest in being friends with my kids. I love them and mostly like being around them (they have their moments as we all do) and I don't really care much if they "like" me from day to day and it doesn't bother me when they say they hate me. It's not my job to be their BFF and make sure they are happy all the time. I'm their mother and it's my job to make them productive members of society. When we're adults and on an even playing ground then we can be friends.
    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 4:03 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • I believe it's best to be a parent AND a friend to your child. From past experience of my own and others, I'd say it's most effective. However, ONLY being a friend is a bad idea, in my opinion.
    LovingSAHMommy

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 4:04 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • No way, I don't want to be friends with my kids. I want them to understand that I am their mother.
    Bubbie0809

    Answer by Bubbie0809 at 4:04 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • And I want to add...my mother has ALWAYS been a parent AND my best friend and I've always had respect for her. I've never cussed her out and I always listened to what she said and obeyed her. Just because someone is their child's friend as well doesn't mean the child won't respect them. You just have to balance it well.
    LovingSAHMommy

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 4:06 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • Bump! I am not our boys friend, I'm their Mother. I will stand behind them, and be their biggest fan, but I will NOT be their friend. Being a parent is a job, and the rewards come from seeing how they turn out, if they tirn out bad, I didn't do my job, and then should suffer the consequences.... I will work hard at my job, and will Love them unconditionally all the way through it.
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 4:08 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • My kids have friends, they don't need their OLD parents pretending to be their friends and re-live a screwed up childhood? See, the way I see it, with all those moms pretending they look cute in their daughter's jeans, or dad's thinking they are still young and cool, something had to of been missing in their lives?

    I was popular in school, I had my time in the sun, and do not feel the need to trot around my eldest son's high school with him and his friends to make up for anything. No need at home either, other than to make sure his homework was done (first since it matters most), did he shower after since we have people that'll need hot water.. etc... etc. I am a mom not his best friend
    MommaClark3

    Answer by MommaClark3 at 4:10 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • After reading some of the responses, I wonder if people have the wrong idea of what it can mean to be your child's friend. I'm saying that because my mom didn't wear my jeans or hang out with me and my friends. Being a friend is more than that and it doesn't mean you have to act the same age as your child. My mom has always been my best friend, but that didn't mean she allowed me to do whatever I wanted or that or that I had no rules or boundaries. It simply meant that I shared everything with her, had more fun with her than anyone else, and it's still that way. I think that's what prevented me from every getting into any serious trouble or making many bad decisions. I always felt comfortable talking to her, unlike some of my friends who were scared of their parents.
    LovingSAHMommy

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 4:18 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

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