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How do i deal with my son not wanting to be around his father's family?

OK need best advice from moms dealing with the in-laws and their children....I have been seperated from my ex husband for two years in that time my ex has left the city state and now recently the county via US Army... Now in this time of him leaving he has seen cory every four months and now since cory is growing older he is starting to forget who his father is I show him pictures and his father calls on the phone cory hangs up the phone or just doesn even talk to him and leaves the room.... Now he is four but if someone else he knows calls then he has all the time in the world to talk.......In the last visits that my son has had with his father or inlaws he has been exhibiting notso great behavior such as falling out when we go places and not listen to the teachers in his school....This has never happened before when i tried to approach his father with this he said he understood but then said that i was just being over protective and that cory was fine......Im trying to keep cory around this but i dont want him going backwards or not trusting me.......SO SO SO SO SO NEED HELP.

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shorty2_02

Asked by shorty2_02 at 7:27 PM on Jan. 25, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 4 (52 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • SOunds like maybe he is mad at him. He is 4 after all and he may not understand completly why his dad is not around as often. Give him time.
    MamaWolf1981

    Answer by MamaWolf1981 at 7:29 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • You as the mother need to make sure your child has a relationship with his father. He is only 4...at this age, he doesn't get to decide whether or not to hang up on daddy or to just not talk to him. It sounds like daddy is making an effort...you need to do YOUR part. Make it clear to your son that when daddy calls, he will talk to his dad for a set amount of time. Also, it sounds like your son needs some counseling. He is obviously harboring a lot of bitterness.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:30 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • I would agree with mamawolf. It sounds like he is mad at his dad for not being around. It is time to talk with your son about why his dad isn't around as much. He is doing an important job protecting our country. Your son will understand and understand more and more as he gets older. I would talk to him about how hanging up on his dad is disrespectful and it is not ok. His dad loves him but is doing what is best for his son.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 7:31 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

  • Well see thats where the rub comes in his father left him way before he left for the army he has only been there for maybe nine months, but physically gone from his son's day to day life for about two years.............And trust this stuff that he does............not an effort........i know the man.....i was married to him for five years...And due to my son's developmental problems talking to him about daddy not being there goes in one ear and out the next.........And my part hey i do everything i can from taking him over there giving him the phone and even staying in his dad's presence with him if he feels uncomfortable......
    shorty2_02

    Comment by shorty2_02 (original poster) at 7:39 PM on Jan. 25, 2011

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