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what is the most difficult relationship?

Other than with a spouse or significant other, what other relationship has been the hardest to deal with in your life or has caused you to think and fret and feel the most? What made it difficult?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:49 AM on Nov. 14, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (14)
  • I recently went thru a bad "break up" with a friend I have had for 8+ years. It was very much a one sided friendship and it ate at me nonstop for a long time. Things finally came to a head and I finally just cut her off. Initially it was very tough. But as time has passed, the "break up" has been getting easier and easier to deal with.
    TheDiva320

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 11:54 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • The one with my mom. She feels the need to insert her opinion into every aspect of my life. She got PISSED at me just last night because I rejected a (fugly fugly fugly) maternity shirt that she'd bought for me. It wasn't my style AT ALL, and there was no way I would ever wear it. She promptly screamed at me and started crying and told me that she would NEVER buy me ANYTHING ever again, even if I was with her. She also felt the need to bring my DAUGHTER into it and say that she would never buy her anything ever again either, because I wouldn't like it no matter what.

    I've repeatedly explained to my mom exactly what styles I like to wear. I've also explained in excruciating detail what kind of things I want my daughter to wear. Yet my mom still picks out crap that looks like it belongs in the 1950's...not the 2000's. I'm 20 years old, not 40. I'm not going to dress like I'm her age. Seriously.
    caitxrawks

    Answer by caitxrawks at 11:55 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • This is a great question. My most difficult relationship has been with my sister who is 8 years older than I am. Unfortunately, my mother put her in a parent role and she's never been able to give up her need to attempt to control me. She uses all kinds of emotional warfare like guilt trips, talking behind my back, complaining about me to anyone who will listen, passive aggressive stuff, you name it.

    This relationship was a basis from which i formed other unhealth relationships on for years. Finally, through counseling and co-dependent anon. meetings, I have been able to find some kind of way to deal with it.

    First of all, I called my sister out on her specific behavior. I told her if she didn't stop, I would not have a relationship with her. Now, I just keep her at a distance. I don't tell her anything I don't want her to know and I keep our conversations surface. Lastly, I don't expect her to ever change.
    pugpin

    Answer by pugpin at 11:56 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Also, my mom has a horrible habit of the "woe is me" syndrome. I have a headache? Too bad, hers is 10x worse. My back hurts? Too bad, so does hers. I have no money? Too bad, she has less than no money.

    It's like no matter how bad my situation is, hers is always a million times worse and I'm a horrible person because I don't sympathize with her.

    I really hope I don't become like her later in life. She has some serious co-dependency issues, even though she claims that she doesn't. *sigh* Sometimes I wish I could just move away from her.
    caitxrawks

    Answer by caitxrawks at 11:56 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • I would say right now it is the relationship with my daughter. She is 12 and going through the usual angst of a child going through puberty. She can get mouthy and mean. She also gets difficult when my boyfriend is present. She really likes him - yet she hates that I love him. Tries to get between us, pulls our hands apart, etc. It takes a lot of energy! But now and then I see the sweet little girl I know shine through.
    kathyartist2007

    Answer by kathyartist2007 at 11:58 AM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • wow I have recently gone through the same exact thing TheDiva and pugpin has but at the same time. My older sister and I have never gotten along. I just cut a friend of just about 8 years loose too. I also just had a baby two months ago and all this happened around the same time so postpartum depression is also there and it's hard not to think about these things. But I am trying my best to re-evaluate my prioirities and concentrate on them rather than the negative.
    nora17

    Answer by nora17 at 12:03 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • the one that caused me the most pain was when my son's gf ran off with their two boys and ripped them out of our lives. I thought my heart would break for sure. What a horrible thing to do to a family, just disappear with children. There was no abuse. She was just nuts and lazy and didn't want to be a mother or live in gf so she ran off to have someone take care of her and let someone else raise her children. She could have left them with us but she was punishing us bc my son thought they should work together as a couple to be a family. He was working and coming home and doing housework and caring for the boys then he told her that was enough, that she had to help and she disappeared.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:06 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • My mom. We're too much alike.
    KLBrown

    Answer by KLBrown at 12:14 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • My relationship with my oldest daughter,,or lack their of
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 12:34 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • While my relationdhip with my Mother has been more than difficult at times. The most problamtic would be with my Father. He is completely cut out of my life now for 7+ years. The reasons are many but the basics are sexual abuse, physical abuse, controlling, lying, in general a manipulative waste of human space.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 12:35 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

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