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MIL problem to let her know or forget the past ?

She's had a problem with me when i became pregnant and her son moved in with me soon after about a month after i told him i was pregnant and his mom from what he has said kicked him out so we been living together and our son was born a week ago now the reason y she doesnt like me is because i went to her house and i asked my bf why she was yelling at me ??? how does that make any sense she's called me a b*tch , W*ore that my baby was a machine now that almost everyone seen the baby she wants to come see him .Should i let her know what im feeling or forget the past?

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firstimemommy21

Asked by firstimemommy21 at 8:12 AM on Jan. 26, 2011 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 12 (663 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Maybe it's time to leave the past there, and try to start fresh. Have her over to see the baby, hopefully she'll have changed her attitude and it will be a nice visit. MIL problems can really interfere with a relationship, if your SO sees you trying (and getting over the past) you won't be the "bad guy" if she continues to be a jerk.
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 8:16 AM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • I would confront her. If you two resolve your issues then its easier to move on. I wouldnt just forget about it all. Talk about it. GL!!
    Steph319

    Answer by Steph319 at 8:16 AM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • I know this is going to be hard, because she was wrong, and you have every right to be hurt, but for your baby's sake and for your bf's sake, I would try to take the high road and not say anything. It doesn't mean you have to be her best friend, or that you have to put up with it if she starts again, but I think I would (cautiously) try to make peace. Your bf will appreciate that you're being the classy, mature one, and, as horrible as she sounds, she could end up being a really good grandma, kwim?

    Oh, btw - when my dh and I got married, we were 20. My dh had a relative that was all nasty about it to my mil, saying how she thought we were too young to get married, we shouldn't be having a baby, etc. (We were engaged, I got pg, we moved the wedding date up.) I just tried to let it go. Well, our ds is 18 now, we're still married, and for yrs now, she's said how great a wife I am, putting up with his Navy career LOL :-)
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 8:17 AM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • And if you arent able to come to an agreement then you both need to agree to be civil
    Steph319

    Answer by Steph319 at 8:17 AM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • I am of the opinion we never forget the past but we do forgive. Forgive her for you, not her. You dont have to forget what she did and be prepared for her to show drama again in the future. Its all part of the mil roll I think? I would let her see the baby and be nice and cordial. I wouldnt bring up what happened before.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 8:18 AM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • babies have a wonderful way of changing people and making them heal past hurts. open your home and heart to your MIL, let the past be the past. tell her you want to wipe the slate clean and start over....if she continues to be ugly then you will need to decide with your partner what boundaries you need to put up. sometimes mothers just freak out about their kids, forgive her.
    lillie70

    Answer by lillie70 at 10:10 AM on Jan. 26, 2011

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