Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

Why the double standard???!!! (? and vent)

I get so annoyed when women(notall) feel the need to make excuses for fathers. My dds dad can be a real jerk off to her and Im sick of it. He never wants to take her anywhere or do anthing unless its convenient for him. And for him it means laying on the couch in the dark and watching a movie. Why cant he take her places??? I dont like hearing that its because he "cant relate" or he cant take her to the restroom. Why cant men be as good at parenting as mothers? I know there are good and bad whether mom or dad. But why do some women make excuses for men? Why if hes watching a Flyers game does he have the right to yell at her for interupting? These are ?'s that Ive gotten pretty redic answers for. Im not saying everyone makes excuses but it seems to be a double standard. My dad was great with us...many say he was the "exception"?! Seriously? NO he should be the rule.

Ahhh that felt good. Any comments/suggestions?? TIA!!

Answer Question

Asked by Steph319 at 5:55 PM on Jan. 26, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 21 (11,543 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • I completly agree with you. There are lots out there who make excuses for the men. I happen to be lucky enough with my ds's dad that he is a pretty good dad and role model MOST of the time. My DD's on the other hand we don't claim at all. I know I made the decision to date him and that led to having her... I am okay with this and LOVE her so much. He left us when I was pregnant and has not been back since. His mom (who we are in contact with frequently) makes excuses for him. And he has txt a couple times making excuses. I didn't list him as the father on the bc and I am glad of it (hard decision but glad I made it).

    Answer by MamaWolf1981 at 6:04 PM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • As long as men get away with it they will keep acting the same way..My husband was like that toonow his daughter really doesnt want to do anything with him.

    Answer by peace013 at 6:04 PM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • i am not fully sure what the question is here but, my father was the EXACT same way with my sister and I. We only got to saw him on the weekends, unless he had a girlfriend who did not like kids, then we didn't get to come over. When we did go he HAD to watch the Nascar race every Sunday, so my sister and I fended for ourselves. He never took us anywhere or did anything.Sometimes he forgot to pick us up, etc. He was never mean to us, but he just didn't care about us. It hurt our feelings, but we still wanted to see him because he was our daddy. Our mother always let us have the choice, although sometimes I can say she did not allow us to go there due to his choice of room mates. All I can say is, now...he feels as though he has done nothing wrong. He has no idea where my hatred for him comes from, and he is mad at me because I have made the choice to not let him be a part of my life for the last 2 years. It will come full circ

    Answer by Tarrar at 6:07 PM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • allot of men are just that way that was the way they were raised. wow sounds like an excuse.... they have brain washed us all!!!
    I have seen allot of great men with kids and see allot of peices of crap! but I think it is they way they were raised???

    Answer by NothinShockin at 6:43 PM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • I agree with you.

    Answer by LiLJeni at 2:15 PM on Jan. 27, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.