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6 Bumps

Am i in the wrong

How many ladies go threw this and when you say something your in the wrong. I have been married 7 yrs and we are going threw proplems now because everytime i try to talk to him he is busy on his phone or the video games and when i say something he gets mad and ignores me am i in the wrong for asking him for some time or who he is always on the phone with

Answer Question
 
Jocelynn18

Asked by Jocelynn18 at 11:00 PM on Jan. 26, 2011 in Relationships

Level 10 (464 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • There is nothing wrong with wanting some quality time uninterrupted and undivided. 

    MrsHouston47302

    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 11:02 PM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • No. He should have time for his wife.
    sunsetbeach81

    Answer by sunsetbeach81 at 11:02 PM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • my DH and I are going through similar stuff right now. Do like I did and put your foot down and say enough is enough. You deserve his undivided attention.
    ready4baby2011

    Answer by ready4baby2011 at 11:03 PM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • u are right to want one on one time and have every right to ask him who hes talkin to that is normal
    MasonsMommy1229

    Answer by MasonsMommy1229 at 11:05 PM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • I think you should be able to ask for quality time because you deserve it. How would he feel if the tables were turned and you ignored him?
    browneyes27

    Answer by browneyes27 at 11:08 PM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • First, a grown man playing video games is NEVER a good thing, IMO. Every time I hear about this, I'm SOOOO glad my DH isn't into that!!!
    The fact you can't talk about it shows that he's protecting himself, probably because he's already ashamed of the fact that he's wasting so much time. A lot of men get ashamed when they know their not measuring up, and it makes them HARDER to approach. I agree with the PP, it's time for you to put your foot down, not just for you, but for HIM too. Time to draw some boundaries and let him know what you will and will not take.
    When DH and I were having issues and I was feeling ignored I just let him know that I would be spending my time where I felt accepted, and that was at my moms house. It was a gentle way for me to withdraw myself and allow him to feel the loneliness. It worked, and he started paying attention really fast.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:13 PM on Jan. 26, 2011

  • Playing video games and watching TV, are you sure you aren't taking care of another child? It would make me mad too. Tell him that you want to have a talk with him before he goes to bed.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:25 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • My husband is on the computer a lot but he also helps me and spends time with me so I don't mind it. but if I didn't get his help with the house and kids and get some alone time with him it would be on like DONKEY KONG!!!
    Candie2008

    Answer by Candie2008 at 1:19 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • No your not.
    LiLJeni

    Answer by LiLJeni at 1:45 PM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • It is not wrong to want to talk with your husband. However, I think you are going about this the wrong way. Rule #1: Never communicate information you consider to be important without first creating a burning curiousity within your listener. Then make sure you can clearly state your need or concern to him. If you want more time, then say you want more time. Step #2 is to relate what you want to something that is important to him. In this case, that would likely be his games or his phone calls. Suggested conversation: What's that game you're playing? Really? That sounds like it would be a lot of fun. Tell me more about it. After he has done that, you can say well, I have some games I like to play, too. Really? What are those? Well, they all require two people and.......Now you have his attention. He will never listen to you if he feels like you are going to jump on him or accuse him. You have to know you man!!
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 1:55 PM on Jan. 27, 2011

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