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What is an appropriate level of punishment?

My 11 year old son has twice gone onto Facebook and set up an account (and a email address) without permission; knowing he is not allowed to. We've had discussions about why it's not safe and that lying and sneaking ar wrong. What is an appropriate level of punishment at this point?


Asked by Baseballmom540 at 1:57 AM on Jan. 27, 2011 in Tweens (9-12)

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Answers (6)
  • Take away all access to gadgets of any kind. No going anywhere without your being present, unless it is another parent whom you trust to keep him honest. He has proven to you that he is not to be trusted; therefore, you don't trust him anywhere with anyone. He is 11, so perhaps you have learned of his untrustworthiness in time to turn him around. Make it clear to him that he has brought all of this upon himself, that you really wanted to trust him, thought you could, but his actions have shown that you were wrong. Hammer the point that it is his choices that have caused all his problems.

    Answer by NannyB. at 12:41 PM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • No computer at all. Only schoolwork is allowed until you see fit. 2 weeks, 1 month. And if he tries again I would take away phone and so games, tv, etc.

    Answer by ILoveCade at 3:18 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • No computer at all for a while. At least 2 months imo and no going to friend's where he could use the computer.

    Answer by SweetLoveofMine at 3:57 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • ground him. no computer. Does he have a cell phone, because kids can go on the wed that way too.

    Answer by HomeAlone45 at 12:36 PM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • No computer. If he has school work to do, he sits the computer in the middle of the family room to do it. Also, maybe take the cell phone away, if he has one, because you can access the internet and FB on those now.

    Answer by amybaby_19 at 12:38 PM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • I would probably say two weeks of no computer (unless necessary for school in which case he has to use it with you in the room) and no friends, going out, phone calls, etc. This would be my punishment for the fact that he did something on the computer he wasn't supposed to, and also that he lied and sneaked around. I would let him know if there is a repeat he will lose privileges for a month and then take it from there. I would also want to know why he wants a facebook page so bad, what is going on there that he is so interested in? Are other friends on there, is there something being said there that he wants to be a part of, what exactly is the major appeal to him that he keeps trying so hard to get on there? Good luck.

    Answer by MaryMW at 12:52 PM on Jan. 27, 2011