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My son will be 3 next month, lately he is defying my every rule & word.

He throw awful temper tantrums & somedays seems just plain mean. Am I doing something wrong and what can I do to make my little boy happier & listen better?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:42 AM on Jan. 27, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (11)
  • No, you aren't doing anything wrong, mama.....He's just doing what 3 year old's do....Be consistent with him and he will outgrow it.....

    Answer by Anna92464 at 9:45 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • No you are not doing anything wrong. This is a terrible two stage of life and he is trying you, may sure to set your rules and stick with them even two and three years old know how to get their way. You are the boss and he is the child be gentle with him but make sure that he knows that you have to tell him what to do and not him telling you. You both will make it and then you will go through it again when he reaches teen aged years.

    Answer by LindaJacobs at 9:46 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • Welcome to the terrible 3's. I don't think they just go through terrible 2's but also terrible 3's! My daughter acts the same exact way. You could play games with him, take him to a play group to socialize, keep him busy. My dd enjoys it when I do a puzzle with her or paint with her, etc.

    Answer by amber1330 at 9:54 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • (Cont.)She is a much happier child when she gets one on one time with mommy.

    Answer by amber1330 at 9:55 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • What about punishments? Im not a hitter so does anyone have any certain tricks they do for punishing? He wont stay in time out & i feel like im escalating the situation by holding him in the time out chair kicking and screaming?? helllppp

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:56 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • We spend a LOT of mommy & me time, I work part time and we arent from this state so we dont have much fam or friends here

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:57 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • It will get better!! just be glad he is not a little girl!! They start out sweet and then about age 7,they become divas and bitches. They stay that way and it gets alot worse!! Boys start out a little hard to handle and they get better and sweeter and calmer and it just gets better and better!!! They stay like that!! I have heard this from my friends who have girls plus from what I have seen about girls! Boys r great!! Just hang in there!!

    Answer by dancer at 10:07 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • He's a toddler, that's what they do. They're testing their bounderies, learning what they can get away with, what sets you off, how to manipulate you, etc. Just keep with your diciplin and don't let him get to you. The angrier you get the more he's going to act out. You just have to stand your ground, be consistant, and follow through with every threat of punishment!!

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 10:33 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • Each child has a "currency" which is THE most important thing to them. We used to take that away for an appropriate length of time as punishment. It won't necessarily be a toy. My youngest used to LOVE watching the trash truck. So, occasionally we would say he would not be allowed to watch it. Zero in on what makes him tick. Be Consistent!! Don't threaten something unless you really will do it. Like saying "you will never watch TV again". That is unrealistic and not something you can follow through on. One other niece has a kindness chart in her home. The kids have to do the things on the chart and they get points or stickers for doing them. After a week or so they get a day out to the park, go out for ice cream, have a special meal, go to a museum, etc. It has worked wonders for them.

    Answer by elizabr at 10:48 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • I think it is totally normal. My daughter was doing that around that age, and we changed things by setting up a "good choice chart," and started giving her a lot of positive response for doing the right thing, and either ignoring or giving minimal input for doing the wrong thing (when possible.) Then she'd "earn" 15 minutes of an activity that she loves.

    Answer by Maisy19 at 11:40 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

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