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If you knew your uncle was cheating on your aunt would you tell her?

my friend & I saw him with one of his college students leaving a movie theater she ducked in the bathroom she was so shocked she didn't know what to say. What do you think they should do? They have been married for 30 years.


Asked by peace013 at 11:18 AM on Jan. 27, 2011 in Relationships

Level 22 (13,054 Credits)
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Answers (14)
  • yes i would, i am very close withmine!

    Answer by gardenchic at 11:21 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • I would confront my uncle and tell him he was being given an opportunity to come clean with my aunt or I would have to tell her myself.

    Answer by misses_nick at 11:21 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • I would stay out of it. She will find out in her own time, if she even wants to know. Putting yourself in the middle of the relationship could result in them being angry at you. How do you know that your aunt doesn't know? Think of how embarrassing that would be for her to have you tell her something she is already dealing with in private.

    Answer by Scuba at 11:21 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • No, I would not. I would confront my uncle. I would give him the opportunity to explain and also a chance to let his wife know. Plus a time line. You have two weeks to tell Aunt Sarah about your relationship. It can also be a mistake. If they went to a movie together I might be inclined to think he is out with a friend. I most likely would have gone up to both of them and started a conversation expecting this is his friend. Or teaching assistant. Or whatever. If I truly thought this was cheating I am going to stay out of the middle and handle this with as much sensitivity and grace that I could. Telling my uncle I saw him making out with this student, saw him inappropriately touching and am concerned. I would tell him I understand relationships are a two way street and complicated - I in no way am passing judgement. But I also


    Answer by frogdawg at 11:23 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • I had a similar situation, but my aunt and I were not close and I did not feel comfortable saying anything. She ended up finding out eventually. Good luck!

    Answer by Groovyflor1 at 11:31 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • Yes she is scared to be the bad guy, and the student is 20ish and he is in his 50's

    Comment by peace013 (original poster) at 11:26 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • can't live with this big secret. I will tell him that I will keep this only between me, him, and my aunt. My preference, I would say, is for him to tell his wife and let them handle it.  I would say I am going to give you two weeks and then I will discreetly call and talk to my aunt about my observations.  Just the facts.  Not that he IS cheating but just what I saw.  I will say I have many male coworkers that I have lunch with.  Even male friends that I go and do activities with.  My husband has no issue with this.  He has famale coworkers that he goes to lunch with.  Even works out with some of them.  We have a good female friend that is a joint friend.  Equally we claim her.  It is not unusual for them to go out and shop, have dinner, or take our son somewhere.  I would hate for people to jump to conclusions and be concerned for a non issue.


    Answer by frogdawg at 11:28 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • Hmmmm that's kind of a tough one. On one hand I'd want to run and tell my aunt on the other hand I would want to give him a chance to say if it was a friend or an actual date. BUT by the sounds of this situation it may just be a date. I would talk to him and tell him that if he doesn't tell his wife in x amount of days then I would be more than willing to tell her so she's not thinking that everything is hunky dory and come to find out he's cheating on her when he brings her some sort of std or something. Good luck and i'm so sorry you had to see that!


    Answer by Bird16_J at 11:29 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • mmm yes i would i would want ppl to tell me if it happend to me

    Answer by Hyde3 at 11:37 AM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • yes...but I'm very close to my Aunt

    Answer by batjmom at 11:38 AM on Jan. 27, 2011