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whats the right words to say ....

K so i'm a stay at home mom and when i say sahm i mean i have a 15 month old daughter and in 2 months a 3 yearold so i wld have to say the longest i have bn away from the oldest is whn i give birth to her sister and she was younger thn thn other than that prolly 2 hours and that was to go to dr or run to twn 20 mins but even still no more than arobly 50 times in 3 years i feel like they dnt no what it is to miss me to b wout me i try to tell there dad but he makes me feel quilty for saying i need to get away for a day or even an afternoon so how do i say i need a afternoon to just go dnt really no or care where but to just go and not feel like he tells me that i cant handle my grls i feel so guilty when i leave them an RUSHED

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:30 PM on Jan. 27, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Tell him that you are taking a day to yourself because you DESERVE some time to yourself and HE will be watching his kids. If he doesn't like it, he doesn't "get any later".
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 10:32 PM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • yeah, when i have stuff to do i always feel rushed also. i freakin hate that
    hellokitty1978

    Answer by hellokitty1978 at 10:33 PM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • Just tell him that all mothers need a break and it's not that you don't love your girls, but you need to be your own person to sometimes, and then ask him if he had to do his job 24/7 if he would need a break from time to time.
    GDTMO2

    Answer by GDTMO2 at 10:37 PM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • Don't give him a choice. Tell him you are going to the spa, and he needs to watch the kids. Its not a choice. If he starts to batter you with guilt..say " I love you, and you and the kids are very important to me, but I am important to, and right now I am going to take care of myself". I
    Tarrar

    Answer by Tarrar at 10:38 PM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • Tell him HE really neeeds to spend some quality time with the kids and you are in his way so you are going to give him an afternoon alone with them. If he says that you can't handle them say "I'm a pro at this baby but you could use some practice thats why I am willing to give you guys your alone time" :-)
    hotrodlassie

    Answer by hotrodlassie at 10:43 PM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • You need to just go and not worry about what he is saying or how he is making you feel. I know easier said then done. My dh used to make me feel guilty but my mil told me that I just need to go, regardless of what he said and take my time. Now, about once a month I go out on a saturday or sunday by myself even if it is just to go grocery shopping. It is so nice to have that quite time. Before I used to worry about how long I was gone. Now I leave and say, I will be back sometime. I know dh can handle things even though he may act helpless at times :) But now when I leave he pretty much says ok, see ya later. But you also have to remember to make sure he is getting his own time as well. Lots of times I will time it. If he goes out with his brother, the next day or two is when I will take my time. He can't really say anything when I say, last night I was home with the kids so tonight is your turn.
    JamieLK

    Answer by JamieLK at 11:32 PM on Jan. 27, 2011

  • You're going to have to take a stand and mean it that you need a break every now and then. I hope you will be strong and stand up for yourself, you deserve a break.
    the_kimmers

    Answer by the_kimmers at 1:58 AM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • I'm sorry, but being a stay at home mom is the hardest job in the world and you absolutely need a day to yourself. I've been doing it since my son was four months old and I don't feel guilty about it whatsoever. Personally, I think it's selfish that their dad would ever make you feel guilty about that.
    rpetullo

    Answer by rpetullo at 2:36 AM on Jan. 28, 2011

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