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Is it normal for a 10 year old boy to have no social life in or out of school?

He is picked on at school he doesnt know how to talk to kids or adults because he gets all scared and when he is at home well here with me and his Dad (thisis my step son) all he wants to do is watch movies. We try to get him to want to go play out side with the other kids and he is so scared. He has never been outside by himself, he cant ride a bike cause he is scared to fall off and get hurt, he doesnt like to play in the dirt with other boys cause he will get dirty, and if you ask him to do something he stares at you with a BLANK look and BATES his eyes....WHAT DO WE DO?????????HEEEELLLLLPPPPPP...all we want is for him to have a great childhood.....

 
Mrs.Norris

Asked by Mrs.Norris at 4:16 AM on Jan. 28, 2011 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 13 (1,094 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • I think you need to get him to a therapist to find out why he is so scared.

    If he is having such a hard time socially, if you and his dad put a lot of pressure on him to do what you think he should be doing, you're just going to make him feel worse about himself. And the worse he feels, the more anxious he'll be and the more scared he'll feel. Obviously he has some issues and I'm sure it is very frustrating, but go easy on the kid. I'm sure he's not happy but clearly doesn't know how to deal with this.

    Really though, try to get him some counseling. Someone or something has made him afraid of life & there is nothing wrong with getting some help dealing with that.
    sweetpotato418

    Answer by sweetpotato418 at 7:12 AM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • I don't the circumstances of him being with you instead of his mother, but could it be that he misses her and needs to see a therapist?
    MelissaCarole

    Answer by MelissaCarole at 4:31 AM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • It's up to you to structure his day. Limit the TV time. Find out from your town/chamber of commerce what is happening in your area and what activities/clubs/sports are avaialbe. Have him sign up for something. We told our kids they had to be involved in one activity each year. Go to the mall together and stop for a treat. Teach him how to order what he wants and purchase the treat. (something small like a drink or ice cream). The idea is to have him out and about not to go shopping. Is there a boys club nearby where he can join an activity? Check it out first to see if it is safe. I hear some have gone down hill. Get a board game that you, dad, and he can play together. Pick something that requires talking, like Scrabble Slam. Visit with family and friends and maybe get them to help make conversation with him. Give them a heads' up that you are trying to help him. Think out of the box for ideas. GL
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 7:09 AM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • Honestly, I think you should instill a lot of encouragement in him. Assuring him that you're there to help him and support him. Try to get him to open up to you. It might help for him to see a therapist. Maybe even if it's just the school counselor.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 10:05 AM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • Thank you for all the advice. He does live with his mom and her boyfriend and with us every other weekend and 2 days out of the week. He has a speach problem where he studders alot alot alot and batts his eyes at you like if something is in your eye all the time. He acts a certain way infront of me then his dad and also a certain way at his moms. She does communicate with me so I know he does things at her house like play with friends next door but wont here. Just a little more info for you all. Thank you
    Mrs.Norris

    Comment by Mrs.Norris (original poster) at 4:29 AM on Jan. 30, 2011

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