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5 Bumps

Loaning a friend money

We all know it's not a very good idea but what if your friend was in a bad place like her man was beating on her kids and her. He posted bail and is still around. She has a job but not the money to start up in a rental. Would you loan money to get her out of the place?

 
mommy_of_two388

Asked by mommy_of_two388 at 3:36 PM on Jan. 28, 2011 in Relationships

Level 43 (154,356 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • Me personally.

    I never **loan** money to family or friends.. I just simply give what is needed if I have it to give. Really, a gift to a loved one (which my friends are just as dear to me as family) always makes more sense to me. Loaning money can cause all sorts of frictions that I have no need or want for in my relationships. So, I just give freely what I have/what I can give instead.

    In this situation. I would just give my friend the money she needed, if I had to it just give her. If I did not have all she needed, I would give her what I could to help her get on her feet.
    pixie_trix

    Answer by pixie_trix at 3:39 PM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • She should get a restraining order, why should she be the one that has to leave, she's the one getting beat as well as the kids. Make his butt go away.
    gumby11883

    Answer by gumby11883 at 3:38 PM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • As long as you understand that you might never see that money again. If you are ok with continuing a friendship with someone that might not pay you back or that might take a long time to pay you back, and you still have NO SAY in what she spends money on, then sure, go ahead.

    Chances are that if you loan her the money, you will be paying more attention to what she spends her money on and you will disapprove when she goes and buys herself something you think is trivial and/or not needed. This has a big potential or ruining friendships. I speak from experience.
    Dalimonster

    Answer by Dalimonster at 3:39 PM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • If you can afford it, give her the money - don't loan it to her.

    sweetpotato418

    Answer by sweetpotato418 at 3:40 PM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • I never loan money, but I will GIVE money when it is needed. If I get it back, great. If I don't it's okay because I did it freely without expecting anything.
    misses_nick

    Answer by misses_nick at 3:42 PM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • Is she dependable? Do you trust her to give the money back? I heard someone say sometime, always loan money with the intent of never getting it back, b/c you may not. So if you're secure enough that you would be ok if you never got the money back, and you know she needs the help, then I would try to help her if you could.
    genagina

    Answer by genagina at 3:40 PM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • I would but I would not expect it back. If she repaid it then that would be great, but I would assume it was a gift to get her out of that relationship.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 3:41 PM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • I don't loan out money, it's a good way to ruin a good friendship. But I have given money as a "gift". I automatically go in expecting not be repaid. And if they happen to do pay me back then I would be more trusting and willing to do it again further down the road if needed, still giving it as a gift.
    Gnomeofmyheart

    Answer by Gnomeofmyheart at 3:49 PM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • I wouldn't loan it--I would give it.
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 3:51 PM on Jan. 28, 2011

  • I lent a couple thousand dollars to a friend once. I knew when I gave it to her that I'd probably never get it back and I didn't. I think as long as you go into it knowing that you might not ever get paid back and are ok with that, then it's ok.
    Syphon

    Answer by Syphon at 3:53 PM on Jan. 28, 2011

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