My dd is 4 and her father is in the military. He was out of her life until she was 2, saw her 2 times a week (just a couple hours each time) for about 9 months. Now he is in the military and out of the country. I have noticed in my posts a few of you ladies saying I need to be sure to foster a healthy relationship between my dd and her dad. Can anyone give me any sugestions apart from what I am already doing? I allow him to talk to her antime he wants between 8am and 7 pm (her waking hours), even though he only calls like once a month and I have only missed one call. I don't allow skype on my laptop because he intentionally sent me a virus through skype when he said he was sending a pic for my d. The tech who fixed it said there was no way he didn't know since the virus was the attachment. BTW it cost about $150 to have it removed. Anytime he asks for pictures of her, I send them though they are always returned "return to sender" because the address he gives me is not right. I am trying to get her excited about him coming back, he will be living only one state away, but she is pretty much indifferent, even on the phone with him, she doesn't get excited or even happy to talk to him. His mother lives around the corner and anytime she sees use, she ignores us or goes the other way, but I ALWAYS give her the option of comming over to see my dd (I don't like walk away or anything). I even told her dad if he wanted to send money, I would buy Christmas and birthday presents from him since he is in Sourth Korea and it would be very hard for him to ship stuff, plus, even he admits, he would have no idea what to buy her. On Christmas morning I made a big deal about the fact that they were from him and showed her a pic of him from his profile on facebook. I don't want a judge to think I am trying to ruin their relationship (or lack there of) and I don't want my dd to one day think that either. Is there anything else I can do? My fiance' is great with her, he has been around since she was one and she calls him "daddy" (we didn't force or even encourage it) so she has a father figure in her life. I tell her she is lucky to have 2 daddy's who love her and she says "no, Hector (my ex) is not my daddy". Oh, he won't give me his cell phone # IDK why but he only calls me from his work line that if you call it back, it goes straight to the main office, and they can't (or won't) connect me. Just in case anyone would suggest letting her call him. I would really apriciate any and all advise. I am at my wits end because it almost seems that he is only interested in her when he wants to be.
Answer by treynlisa at 9:54 PM on Jan. 28, 2011
Answer by matthewscandi at 10:06 PM on Jan. 28, 2011
Answer by matthewscandi at 10:11 PM on Jan. 28, 2011
Answer by treynlisa at 10:12 PM on Jan. 28, 2011
Answer by stressedoutgran at 1:18 AM on Jan. 29, 2011
Answer by treynlisa at 11:07 AM on Jan. 29, 2011
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