What are the pros and cons of adopting a tween? Do the pros outweigh the cons? We have been looking at kids of various ages that we would like to adopt and came across a couple kids who were tweens. We have come across boys and girls so any info you could over about tweens would be helpful! Thanks!
Answer by Michigan-Mom74 at 12:59 AM on Jan. 29, 2011
Answer by Michigan-Mom74 at 1:05 AM on Jan. 29, 2011
We have thought about it and we are adoptive parents to a wonderfully active little boy. The advantage to a tween or even a teen....you most likely will have a history of development. You know more about cognition, skills, strengths, and also areas that a child may have some difficulty with. A young child, toddler or infant, you have no clue what that will be like. Part of my desire for an older child is that I don't want to worry about will she talk? Will she hit all of her mile stones? Are there any learning issues? As a perspective parent to an older child you are able to clearly lay out for the case worker what your strengths are and what your limitations are as a parent. It can be harder for an older child to accept this is the forever family and home. Which means you just have to work harder, for years, to be available and keep reassuring and proving that you are the real deal.
Answer by frogdawg at 7:01 PM on Jan. 29, 2011
Saving for college and buying a car are my concerns. I want a car for the part time job, to and from activities, and to and from college when that day comes. Also saving for college becomes a little bit more pressured. Some states pay for college for children adopted as teens as a way to ease that worry for perspective parents. And for me - making sure it is a good fit for the foster child as well as my son. The good news: you do have time. Adoption won't happen over night. The tween/teen has a say in if this is a good fit from their perspective. They can turn you down. You have time as parents to decide if you can parent this child and provide this child with all of their needs to the best of your abilities. If we adopt again this is so attractive to me that I can't help but be drawn to this option.
Answer by frogdawg at 7:06 PM on Jan. 29, 2011
Answer by GlitteribonMom at 7:20 PM on Jan. 29, 2011