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Unsure of what to do?

DONT BASH ME. Ok so i went to a new gyno yesterday, referred by fam doc. Ok so I met her and I just didnt like her she was about as warm as a wet blanket that was left out in the snow. I tried to talk to her about some probs I am having and I felted so uncomfortable and didnt want to tell her anything else. I feel really bad because I don't want her to think I don't want her for my doc because she is black. I am not racists in anyway. I just did not feel comfortable with her. So do I keep goin so she doesnt think that about me or do I find someone else so I can tell everything thats goin on. Again it has nothing to do with her being black.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:48 PM on Nov. 14, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • If you don't feel comfortable get a new doc
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:49 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Her race is not the issue, so don't make it an issue, you know? I'm sure she would be highly offended if she thought you were staying with her despite being unhappy just because she's black and you don't want to seem racist. You don't have to "break up" with her. Just schedule your next appt with someone else. Patients come and go all the time. She won't even think twice about it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:53 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • I would find a different doc that makes you feel more comfortable. The way you feel is no different than a person that doesnt like male docs. That doesnt make a person sexist. just go with your feelings.
    lilmans_mommy

    Answer by lilmans_mommy at 8:57 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • You have to go to a doctor your comfortable with, especially one that deals with so many personal issues. I would just find another doctor, I've switched several times, you have to keep searching until you find the right one. GL
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 9:02 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • I agree, find a doctor that you feel comfortable with, especially a gyn. You should feel comfortable during the exam and that you can ask any questions you want. I ended up going to a physician's assistant and she chattered all through the exam and I hardly even knew it happened. Then I was able to ask questions. I felt very comfortable.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 9:09 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Color...NEVER matters anymore in the doctor field anyway.
    There are more colors of doctors then there are american citizens i swear!

    Anyway...

    IF YOUR not comfy...get a new doc...you pay the doc ...and you need to feel safe..i mean one day god forbid..you might have cancer down town...or somthing...and you wouldnt want her to take care of you would you?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:54 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Your comfort needs to come above everything else. Get a new doc!
    KatieCrandall

    Answer by KatieCrandall at 9:58 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • What you are feeling is what is called white guilt. You try to overcompensate trying not to offend which is not what is needed, to treat everyone with the same consideration is. If she is not a match for you find someone who is.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:02 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • I had a new gyno one time, she came in, and was very rude to me. I would say something that was going on and she would turn it into this question that made me feel like shit. Before she even started getting close to me I knew she was not a dr I wanted and I said "im sorry - Im going to have to make a differnet appt." and I got up, got dressed, went to the desk and rescheduled - with someone else. She was black - it had nothing to do with that though - it had to do with the fact that I could not have someone I was uncomfortable with as my gyno. I know that sounds rude - but I didnt even want to ask her every thing I wanted to ask - and they were things I wanted checked out. Within a few weeks of working there, she was fired though for so many complaints - so I wasnt the only one.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:15 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • She probably has a ton of patients so if youve been there once she isnt going to notice if you dont go back, plus I only see my gyno once a year for my annual unless im having an issue so if you dont come back she probably wont think twice. Find someone you feel comfortable with, ask your family dr for another referral if that would make it easier to find one.
    Mommy_of_two_85

    Answer by Mommy_of_two_85 at 11:35 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

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