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MY 11 YR OLD DAUGHTER SAID THAT SHE IS NOT THAT INTERESTED BY BOY SHE SAID THAT SHE HAS MORE CRUSHES ON GIRLS WHAT SHOULD I DO OR TELL HER?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:29 PM on Nov. 14, 2008 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (12)
  • Wow, Does she mean as friends??
    emturner

    Answer by emturner at 9:34 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • it is ok for her to think girls are more fun to be around. Tell her God has a guy for her to marry one day and she is still a little girl and doesn't need to be romantic at this age even if she feels pressure. do role plays.
    TXdanielly

    Answer by TXdanielly at 9:36 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • I wouldn't put a lot of emphasis on a child of 11. They don't know much at that age. Maybe what she has is curiousity of what other girls look like and how they act, but I doubt it's anything more than that. Is she around any sisters or anything? I know I didn't have any sisters and I was always curious as to what being a girl always meant...
    pupmom

    Answer by pupmom at 9:37 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Well, if she were my daughter, I would tell her that that's okay, and that some girls do have crushes on other girls. But I would caution her that most other girls might not know how to react if they find out about these crushes. So this could be an opportunity to talk to her about what it means to have a crush, and what she does/how she acts when she likes someone. She may be gay, she may be bi, she may be straight. Tough to tell at that age.
    BlueFrogMama

    Answer by BlueFrogMama at 9:37 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Just let her be herself and love her no matter what.
    1erica1978

    Answer by 1erica1978 at 1:12 AM on Nov. 15, 2008

  • Not all 11 year old girls are that interested in boys, not the way most girls her age may seem to be with crushes, etc. Her "crushes" on girls, I would guess, are probably a confusion of not "liking" boys (like her girlfriends do) and thinking she is "supposed" to have crushes and personally enjoying her friendships with her girlfriends more.
    If your personal beliefs come into play with how you are raising her and where your concerns may be than I would talk to her carefully but honestly.
    Take some time to "look" at her from a different perspective. Does she still act like a "child"? Does she seem into all the popular "crushes" all the other girls her age are into (musicians, actors, tv characters, etc.) How much is she exposed to and does she understand about relationships, love, sex, homosexuality and heterosexuality?
    lanimommy81

    Answer by lanimommy81 at 2:57 AM on Nov. 15, 2008

  • cont....

    I wasn't into boys till late into Jr. High (which was way after all my girlfriends.) Boys just held no interest to me. However I was also oblivious to the idea that I was "supposed" to have all these crushes. My girlfriends all had boyfriends, etc I just didn't want one- I didn't get the appeal. Now at the same time I greatly valued my girlfriends and had you asked me I would have said I loved them- but it wasn't a romantic crush and because I was oblivious to the whole relationship thing it would not have meant the same thing as people would have assumed nowadays.
    lanimommy81

    Answer by lanimommy81 at 2:57 AM on Nov. 15, 2008

  • 11 seems young to me to expected them to be interested in boys. at 11 they should just have funplaying witht heir girlfriends and not worrying about boys.
    and withthe media and L.Lohan (etc), our younger children are exposed to more and have a variety of 'role models'

    are you asking about boys? I'd just drop the issue and let her be a kid
    Kiter

    Answer by Kiter at 12:54 PM on Nov. 15, 2008

  • See my mom just threw this question at me a few weeks ago she said what if your son grows up to be gay. i said well i would accept it and move on because where in the world are you gonna get if you try to stop them?? it just makes them wanna go for it more! but as a child i always wondered if i like boys or girls to. like 8 years later come to find out i love guys lol.
    erica4569

    Answer by erica4569 at 2:19 PM on Nov. 15, 2008

  • Just let her know girls are supposed to be with boys..I honestly think she just says that not really meaning it like that..I mean everyone thinks their kids are gay at such young ages i really wouldnt worrie about it i bet if you talk to her bout it and let her know everything she needs to know she will deff. change her mind on that lol
    gracie43008

    Answer by gracie43008 at 6:46 PM on Nov. 15, 2008

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