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3 Bumps

I don't want my dd in this situation

My dd's father and I are divorced and have been for about 4 years. My dd is 13 and my ex has a step dd who is 14. The 14 year old step dd is pregnant and the plan is for her boyfriend to move in when the baby is born. My dd is there EOW and I really don't want my dd spending the night in a place where there is a 17 year old boy spending the night. Am I wrong? This is not about her being 14 and pregnant, while I do not expect my dd to get pregnant this young, she does go to public school and knows kids her age are having sex, so this is no suprise to her. I am thinking about asking if she can just go over during the day instead of spending the night. The SM is kinda irresponsible so none of my dd's friend's parents let them spend the night there, only at my house, so this would also enable my dd to have sleep overs more then 2 times a month.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:19 PM on Jan. 29, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (14)
  • i don't blame you. i would feel the same way, the situation is too messy imo.

    Answer by gwen20 at 7:22 PM on Jan. 29, 2011

  • you are not wrong. absolutely not wrong. i would discuss this with her father and see how it all plays out. i think its a good suggestion and make sure to stick to your guns. good luck.

    Answer by lambdarose at 7:24 PM on Jan. 29, 2011

  • I probably wouldn't like it either, but I'm not sure legally you can do anything about it. Good Luck.

    Answer by ohwrite at 7:24 PM on Jan. 29, 2011

  • If you feel that strongly about it I would mention it to your ex and i would also petition the court for the visitation to be changed. Make sure it is writing....good luck momma.

    Answer by bcauseimthemom at 7:30 PM on Jan. 29, 2011

  • Let her stay over there if you have taught her about sex and know she won't do anything then there shouldnt be anything to worry about...right.

    Answer by luvmygrlz at 7:40 PM on Jan. 29, 2011

  • luvmygrlz, she is a 13 year old girl, she shouldn't be put in that situation. Would you let your 13 year old girl spend the night, in a home with little to no supervision, with a 17 year old boy?

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:45 PM on Jan. 29, 2011

  • Why don't teens have aspirations beyond having babies? What happened to college? Backpacking though Europe? Learning who they are and what they truly want out of life?

    Answer by rkoloms at 7:51 PM on Jan. 29, 2011

  • rkoloms, I agree, my dd is almost a straight A student (maybe a B here and there). Not that I think this could never happen to her but I hope I have taught her enough to wait till she is older. I don't think my dd would jump right into bed with the 17 year old but you never know what can happen when teens are unsupervised

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:22 PM on Jan. 29, 2011

  • You should check your custody and visitation papers before you tell her father that she can't be there overnight, you could be breaking a court order and end up in contempt of court.

    rkoloms: The majority of teens do have aspirations other then getting pregnant. As for backpacking through Europe, that is laughable because most people don't have the money to feed their kids let alone send them out of the country or even to college. Give teens credit because most of them are amazing, smart, responsible and respectful kids.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:17 PM on Jan. 29, 2011

  • oh tyfry, I am filing this with the court for a change in visitation. I was gonna just talk to my ex but I think it needs to be in writing

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:38 PM on Jan. 29, 2011

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