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Desperately tring to Concieve and family gets pregnant first

My husband and I have been tring to concieve and are seeing a fertility specialist. So it came as a surprise when my cousin got pregnant after just getting married and is 19 and still tring to finish school and that it was planned. I know I should be happy for them but am heartbroken. My family knows we have had problems and are in my face about the pregnancy. Is it wrong to feel hurt and alittle perturbed??

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Asked by krista1015 at 11:11 PM on Nov. 14, 2008 in Trying to Conceive

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Answers (12)
  • be happy!

    it sucks that you are having issues but that doesn't mean you should be angry at others that don't have issues with fertility.

    I'm sure you are sad that it's not you pregnant.

    but seriously, this is not a reason to get mad at family!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:12 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • no you are not wrong for feeling upset if the are throwing it in your face your time will come hony and when it does let me offer you a congrats ahead of time

    Answer by jodi205 at 11:15 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • I don't think your wrong to feel hurt especially when your family is putting it in you face

    Answer by babyspots17 at 11:16 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • I am an RN and a mother and it is not bad to feel this way.... I had trouble getting preggo too.... I thought i would never be able to have a child after having a miscarriage and the doctors told me it was a 1 out of 1,000,000 chance i would... It can be alot of things why u arent preggo yet.... u might be too stressed out over it, u might need to find some ways for u to relax before u and ur hobb do anything... if u need any help, questions or anything just message me

    Answer by Pooky_mommy at 11:16 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • Nobody should be in your face about this. It was her time and hasn't been yours. Her pregnancy has nothing to do with yours. Rejoice with her with all of your heart, hug her baby with love. When it is time for you, you would want her to do the same. Having said all of that, it is natural that you'd feel conflicted about this. She has something that you have wanted very much, although really she is having her baby, not yours, so you don't need to be mad at her for having a baby. You wouldn't want your cousin to be sad about not being able to conceive. Be happy for her. And I wish you the very best of luck in your efforts. I hope I haven't caused offense. I really do wish you the best.

    Answer by Bmat at 11:19 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • thanks for the replies. Sometimes you need to talk to people who would understand so thank you for your support thats why I like this site. I am happy for them. I am just a little hurt for us. Thanks for the shoulders:)

    Answer by krista1015 at 11:50 PM on Nov. 14, 2008

  • I am going through a similar situation. I was told that I couldn't have more children after I have been trying for so long, and women in my family keep getting pregnant, including a niece of mine who is pregnant from a rape and keeping the baby. I don't hate them, but can't help but feel hurt, even when they and other family members rub it in my face, and I'm not exaggerating it. It's like they can't wait to tell me, Hey they got pregnant again and you're still not. I hear it all the time and its heartbreaking. Good luck to you.

    Answer by sylvia-ann at 12:14 AM on Nov. 15, 2008

  • It's perfectly understandable to feel the way you do, but I'm going to play devil's advocate for a minute: are you sure it doesn't just FEEL like they're rubbing it in because you want it so bad? I mean, they're not going to NOT be excited because you're not, know what /i mean?

    Not that it makes things any easier on you, I can't begin to understand how awful you must feel. <>

    Answer by KatieCrandall at 1:08 AM on Nov. 15, 2008

  • Not at all. I can see why you would feel hurt and it is ok. Don't beat yourself up, everything happens for a reason and if you keep at it and keep positive, you'll get your angel.

    Answer by Mrs.Corona1 at 1:43 AM on Nov. 15, 2008

  • its ok i understand im going thru the same thing but just smile and keep on trying one day it will come

    Answer by ms.miracle at 2:07 AM on Nov. 15, 2008

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