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Should we tell them they are about to be grandparents???

Long story short, my husband and his parents had a falling out about a year before our wedding, about him marrying me, they didn't want him to. They didn't come to the wedding, yes they were invited. Anyway, it is 6 months after the wedding, I am 16 weeks pregnant, we are so excited but we don't know how to handle it. Should we call them and tell them? My husband works in the same hospital as his mother and some of his co workers know her, so she will find out sooner or later. Do you think we should just let her find out when someone tells her and let her tell his dad or should we call and tell them? I am just worried that it will be very awkward of we call them. I am also not even sure if I would want them around the baby as they didn't even want us to get married.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:52 AM on Jan. 30, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • Yes tell them. Maybe they will have a change of heart, maybe not, but at least you'll know you did the right thing.
    EverydayMomma

    Answer by EverydayMomma at 10:54 AM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • I, sadly, was in the same boat. You don't have to call them, because it WOULD be awkward. Honestly? They're gonna find out sooner or later, so you COULD let it go....but I would probably send an email. I sent my mother an email letting her know the gender of our baby, and I didn't get a response, but I felt better, because at least I made an effort.
    DMac08

    Answer by DMac08 at 10:56 AM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • Yes tell them. Having a grandchild some times changes things. Me and my in laws didnt get along the best when dh and I met and got engaged. Once we had our dd though they changed their tune and had to basically accept me because they wanted to be involved with their grandchild. I allowed it as well because I think children should have the right to be spoiled by their grandparents even if we dont get along.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 11:06 AM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • It should be handled by your son either with a visit or a call. Much better done in person, but a call would be OK. Email is too impersonal IMO. Good luck!
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 11:06 AM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • i would send a very nice announcement, with hand written note to them
    use hand written words like...expecting their grandchild, happy to announce
    make as special as you can without going overboard
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 11:06 AM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • Sadly if they are so immature they are willing to loose their blood ties to their son over you getting married... don't expect them to "change" just because you got knocked up? Probably give them more fuel for the fire THEY created.

    Makes about as much sense as thinking getting pregant will keep a husband, or if a woman behaves her husband would beat her, or whatever other analogy you choose to place it too? fact is, they are willing to give up their actual child, and than be so immature to not attend his hopefully ONLY wedding, and now they'll probably se him as "stuck" with a woman they didn't want him in the first place??? Seriously??? Let his co-workers tell them... and they can explain to co-workers why they are so cruel to not even know he was going to be a daddy???

    What did you do to be hated so much? I found God, never once judged, but was accused of thinking I was too good, and judging... LMAO!!! I wanna fix me
    MommaClark3

    Answer by MommaClark3 at 11:08 AM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • I'm white, they are Asian. That is why they don't like me
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:21 AM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • yes i would tell them that is the right thing if they dont like that is on them but i hope everything works out for you
    Ricanmami1

    Answer by Ricanmami1 at 12:19 PM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • I think just do what you and/or your hubby think is best. Personally I think they have a right to know, but I would probably just tell them in a small way. Just "by the way, you're going to be grandparents." Short and simple. My ex (current best friend) always said that if we had a baby, he wouldn't tell his parents. They're his adopted parents and they haven't talked in a year. He said they'd probably want to know, so he'd probably tell them after the baby was born, and then see what happened from there.
    AdensMama0308

    Answer by AdensMama0308 at 12:37 PM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • I would let your husband decided it is his family and only he will know how they would react
    teen_mommy1133

    Answer by teen_mommy1133 at 3:03 PM on Jan. 30, 2011

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