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I love my family, but they are treating me like a bank! How do I stop them from asking to borrow money all the time??


I love my family, I really do. But they are not very responsible with their finances. My sister is living beyond her means because her rent and household expenses far exceed her income. My uncle-I don't know what he does with his money. He doesn't pay rent where he's living, and he doesn't have a car, so I'm not sure what his story is. They are constantly asking to borrow money- $25 here, $200 there, and they swear it's for bills, or cough meds (that was my uncle's last excuse!!). I'm sick and tired of it. I'm not a bank. I am an unmarried mom with a toddler. I need to make sure my daughter's needs are met before these two grown people. I have a little money saved that I received from a life insurance policy my mom left me, and I get ssdi for a disability. I can't squander that money on loans to family members!

How do I politely tell them that I can't lend them anymore money? I don't want to hurt feelings. My sister always lets me stay with her when my tot and I come to visit, and my uncle (who lives there) always cooks for us. I'm not sure how to say what I want to say without hurting feelings.

Any advice?


Asked by Anonymous at 6:27 PM on Jan. 30, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (18)
  • Trying saying NO the next time someone asks for money.

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 6:30 PM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • Tell them that you can't afford to lend out money.

    Answer by Simplicity3 at 6:31 PM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • Just tell them you are tapped out. If you keep saying no, they will look elsewhere. They keep asking you because you keep giving it to them.

    Answer by Marwill at 6:40 PM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • You need to pull your backbone out of your bag, and tell them no, and don't ask again

    Answer by rkoloms at 8:01 PM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • Don't give it to them! "Go try the bank, sorry!"

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:32 PM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • Say "No friggen way, get a job because i cannot afford you"

    Answer by samurai_chica at 6:48 PM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • telll them the truth

    Answer by 21lisa72 at 8:19 PM on Jan. 30, 2011

  • Tell them exactly what you told us that you have to be able to take care of yourself and your daughter. You two come first and that is how it should be. Just tell them that you can't be taking care of them too its not fair to you or your daughter.

    Answer by Chole06302010 at 12:08 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • tell them you r not the bank...

    Answer by smiley745 at 8:01 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Just say "NO!!"

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 9:47 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

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