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2 Bumps

Needs help for myself and my son...

My husband left last week for basic training, and will be gone for 14 months. I find myself very depressed and it is also affecting my two year old son. My son knows that his daddy is gone, but doesn't understand why or where he went. He watches videos of his daddy every night, but still asks for him, or expects him to walk in the door which is also hard on me. Any advice on how to help my two year old cope, and any advice for me as well.

Answer Question
 
ashtonjames

Asked by ashtonjames at 12:12 AM on Jan. 31, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 5 (96 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • if you have not already, join a group here for military wives. good luck.
    mellypoo

    Answer by mellypoo at 12:14 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Tell him daddy went to work and will be home soon. It is a hard life to lead. And the kids never really get used to it. For you, just keep busy and remember that before you know it he will be home! Plus after basic he should be able to use his phone again. What branch? I have gone through 2 bootcamps, 1 A school, 1 C school and a couple deployments. Had my son for all but 1 boot camp.
    ILoveCade

    Answer by ILoveCade at 12:18 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Could you do skype? You could do a picture book for your husband of artwork that your son did while he was deployed-- a journal of sorts. Also, there are books now that your husband can record with his voice. Could you send one to him and have him record a story so that your son can hear his voice every night?

    Unfortunately, at 2 years of age, they don't have a way of understanding the timelines involved. However, you can ease his anxiety by reminding him how much his daddy loves and misses him, and that daddy wants to be home too. But Daddy is working very hard and making sure that everyone here is safe, and when he's done his part, he will come home.
    Busimommi

    Answer by Busimommi at 12:19 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • He is in the army. He just left for basic, so as of right now we have no communication. Hopefully soon I will start getting letters and a phone call maybe once a week. But before he left he did make a video of him telling him daddy had to go far away for a while, and that he stills loves him, and he read him a few books. Ashton watches it every night before bed and hugs the tv. I am still working right now as well which is hard on ashton. He has been super clingy towards me since my dh left, and acts like i am going to abandon him when I go to work. If I didn't need the money I would quit to spend more time with him. Hes taking it harder than I expected. And my dh will be gone for 14 weeks, and then we will be moving to where ever they station us at.
    ashtonjames

    Comment by ashtonjames (original poster) at 12:38 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • You have to try to be positive and not show him your pain. He can know you miss him but you are looking forward to his coming home. Show him the positive and talk to him. But keep it positive.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 2:02 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

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