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Advice on some highschool "mean girls" drama

We are all in our 30s, definitely not high school but OMG sometimes the cliquish BS feels like that. OK, so in my daughters preschool, most of the moms hang out together. I would say at least 7 of them are BFFs. Well, I enrolled my DD a year ago and have been invited to a few birthday parties and moms night out, BUT the "obvious" leader of the pack doesnt like me. I feel that way because she never acknowledges me, never says hello, never invites me to anything, never even speaks to me. Whenever the other ladies invites me to any gettogether, I do make an effort to go, and when I get there, she doesnt even speak to me. I do say hello which she answers to, but thats about it. BTW, we are all friends of FB so I do get notifications of some of the things that they all do together, which I never got invited to.

Anyway, heres the reason behind this post. The "pack leader" (lol) started working out and got a few of the other ladies to join her. They all work out at the same gym, at the same time and with the same personal trainer. She never asked me to join, although if she had asked, I would have obliged because I do need to lose a few pounds. Anyone, I ran into one of the other girls today at the mall and she asked me if the "pack leader" had invited me to join because they all work out together now. I said no and I had no idea about that and if she had invited me, I would have joined. Well, she said I am more than welcome to join them if i wanted to. well heres the thing...I know that the pack leader would not like me there. If she wanted me there, she would have asked me in the first place. But, I am friendly with the rest of the group and I do need some motivation/a gym partner to work out...I could say screw her and join regardless, but it might be unpleasant for me because of her snotty attitude towards me.

So I just need some advice...would you join regardless of this situation or would u pass up on this.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:23 AM on Jan. 31, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • i would definitely join. by the way, ignore her and be extra friendly with the rest of the girls. it will totally drive her insane. when u see her. act too busy to notice her. and when u walk into a gathering, rush to one of the girls and say things. just totally act drama queen and like ur the leader n dont even look at her. she'll be following you later. (if she acts high school, then give her high school) i know what u mean, some women just never got over themselves, i guess. join, and act like you joined for them, and dont even give her a glance. she'll DIE! LMAO.
    fefe87

    Answer by fefe87 at 12:29 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • honestly , I would join regardless of the situation..you never know what good might come out of it ...this may be just a big misunderstanding ..you guys might actually have alot in common or really enjoy each other when you ladies give each other a chance.try .it ...atleast you wont have to play the what if card ....
    amiyamom08

    Answer by amiyamom08 at 12:29 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Yep I say join and screw the "pack leader" she's just miserable that's why she's such a cunt. I really wish some of those "women" would grow up and realize that they are NOT who they think they are. They just need to grow up. I hope you go and have a good time with the other ladies especially if they're friendly with you and like you.
    Bird16_J

    Answer by Bird16_J at 12:44 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • I say just join
    Pink_caffiene

    Answer by Pink_caffiene at 1:30 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • According to Dr. Philip Zimbardo, the way to dissolve a "pack leader"'s hold on a group of people is to disregard her snese of entitlement when it comes to the power she holds. Join and be yourself, and if the "pack leader" ever decides to be directly rude to you, with or without witnesses, call her on her rudeness and let her know that she's not getting to you, she's not controlling your actions and you don't buy into her crap.
    Fistandantalus

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 6:41 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • I wl join jus to irk her lol
    smiley745

    Answer by smiley745 at 7:12 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Yes I would join!!
    momto4girzls

    Answer by momto4girzls at 8:22 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

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