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What Should I Do?

I have been in a relationship now for 5yrs, and everything is good with us now, he made mistakes in the beginning but not lately. anyways my first love who I've been inlove with since I was 8yrs old, now I'm 28yrs old so for 20yrs found me on facebook, and told me he wants to come see me I havent seen him in 10yrs I still have feelings for him so should I go see him or be happy with what I got?


Asked by alyssbrm at 8:19 AM on Jan. 31, 2011 in Relationships

Level 4 (35 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • If youre happy in the relationship now then no I wouldnt. You need to ask yourself why you want to see this guy? Are you not happy? Do you not love the person you are with? If you have kids together do you think its fair to the kids or best for them?

    Answer by gemgem at 8:31 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • What would your goal be in seeing this guy? Do you want/need his friendship? Truly, I wouldn't go meet him. After 10 years of no contact, you really don't have a friendship, why start one?

    Answer by Scuba at 8:22 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • I agree with Scuba. You are opening a can of worms that should stay closed. If you are happy in your current relationship, why go see the one that got away? It will stir up some more feelings and you might start second guessing yourself in your current relationship.

    Answer by Dalimonster at 8:32 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • you do not really know this other person
    and seeing them will stir thoughts that are not real, but past dreamy memories
    i would not, this other person is not real, in the sense that ten years and only memories from childhood are not a real relationship but only memories from the heart
    time clouds things

    Answer by fiatpax at 8:42 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • If you're genuinely happy in your relationship now, then why would you want to throw a wrench in it by seeing an old flame?
    You have feelings for who he WAS. You don't know him as a person now, because it's been 20 years. You don't know if you still have feelings for him, because you haven't been in contact with him. You're in love with the person you knew back then. Don't let yourself believe that what you knew carries on into today, because neither of you are the same people. Now, that's not saying that who he is now can't be the same or the love can't be the same .. I'm just saying don't fool yourself into holding onto a love that was 20 years ago. It's silly.

    You're in a relationship now. You're happy, so what is it worth to you if you're willing to throw that all away for someone who MIGHT be the guy you love?

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 10:24 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • GO see him it may be God's way of saying the re-ship that you are in is not meant to be. Sometimes god let's you stay in something because you want to. But it may not be right. He knows what he is doing. go ahead and plus it's casual that's not wrong.

    Answer by Chelsz101 at 8:52 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Not unless you end what you are calling a good relationship. You can't have both, it will cause a lot of problems. Don't open that door. If you really want to see the guy you're in love with for 20 years, you really shouldn't be with someone else. Isn't that a lie to tell someone you love them when you're thinking of or feeling for someone else too?

    Think about both and see where you want to be.

    Answer by rio_burb at 9:14 AM on Jan. 31, 2011