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2 Bumps

Success and wanting more is bad? Really?

I started going back to school about a year and a half ago which requires me to get online for classes at least 5 days a week. My husband has a huge issue with this and gets upset about it cuz he says I am always on the computer at night. But I work full time during the day and by the time I cook dinner, help the kids with homework, and feed them, I get online to do my school work. So much for supportive husband, but I have poinited out the alternative would be me driving over an hour to school then sitting in class for 3 hours and then driving an hour home, not to mention homework several nights a week. Online classes at least make me accessible to the kids and family. I don't see why he does not want me to succeed?

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2boysnaprincess

Asked by 2boysnaprincess at 11:26 AM on Jan. 31, 2011 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,438 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • He is probably just feeling neglected. No matter how old a man gets they are still a little boy and he needs more attention. If he helped you out with dinner or house work you could squeeze in a little "quality time" together. I took online classes and it was the same way. It goes quickly. Just try to hold it together for now. You'll look back and won't remember how stressed you were, just that you accomplished something great!!!

    jen2774161

    Answer by jen2774161 at 11:29 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • He's missing his time with you. Try and squeeze him in every once in awhile and he won't get so upset about the online classes. Either that ore become a huge nag and hang all over him, he'll be signing you up for more classes in no time! :)
    amybaby_19

    Answer by amybaby_19 at 11:30 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • He's probably jealous and insecure. Did he finish school? Is he at a job that he loves? Men can get like that.
    Bugzmomma

    Answer by Bugzmomma at 11:32 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • I think it might be more of a "I don't get enough of your time" issue. I doubt that he doesn't want you to succeed. I think he just resents not having enough time with you, alone, w/o the kids.

    Do you have to login 5 days/wk. Are you taking a full course load? Maybe you can take fewer classes for a longer period of time. I mean, if you are taking more than 1 class.

    Dalimonster

    Answer by Dalimonster at 11:33 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • But the kicker is the time would be time to just sit and watch tv anyways as he sits and watches his hunting channel, which is boring to me anyways so what difference does it make if I am looking at the computer screen while he is watching the mighty buck hunters on tv, we are still in the same room? He is just being a big baby about foolishness.
    2boysnaprincess

    Comment by 2boysnaprincess (original poster) at 11:34 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • I have been doing an online course for the last year. I stay home and wanted to go to class on campus as it is very close and because I knew I'd get more done being out of the house, but what I wanted to go for was offered only online. I'm probably going to be in the minority but I think he should be a lot more supportive. I, for now, don't have a full time job outside the house but doing the work was still extremely hard. I still had to do everything here with kids and housework and everything else that came up and didn't get any help from my DH even though he said he would when I started the class so I don't have the most sympathy for a husband who won't help or complains about taking a class that will lead to what could better the family situation. I did my work off and on during the day and still had to work at nigh. I'm with you. He should be more supportive.
    wildflowers25

    Answer by wildflowers25 at 11:39 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Men are visual creatures. He SEES you at the computer all the time. If you were not there he wouldn't see what you are doing so for some reason it doesn't matter what you are not doing as much as it matters what they See you doing. A lot of men aren't supportive of women getting ahead. Just keep doing it. He'll appreciate it in the end.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:44 AM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • He misses you and the time you and he used to spend togethter. Men are in a sence like children. They are very needy and want your constant attention weather its just sitting next to them watchin tv, talking to them or sex. Find a way to give him attention on the weekends or a few minutes here and there a hug and kiss saying thank you for your support and se if it changes. Use reverse phycology.
    Good luck, dont give up you are doing great. But there is a chance he can be worried some men do get treatened by a wives sucsess that if you go to high you wont need him any more. Just tell him you love him and you will always need him.
    21lisa72

    Answer by 21lisa72 at 1:03 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

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