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2 Bumps

Have they quit or not?

Does your kid threaten to quit band and wants to quit band? Have you let them?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:47 AM on Jan. 31, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (11)
  • My son did quit band in high school. I knew nothing about it. In later years he told me I should have made him stay and I reminded him I knew nothing about it. By the time I knew it was too late to get him back in. It was a shame...........he was good. I told him he can always take up an instrument. It is up to him, not me, if he is motivated.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 12:46 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • my son wanted to quit soccer and we made him finish out the season.
    When you are part of a team you can not be that self centered.... you have made a commitment to a TEAM and took a spot someone else could have had. You have an OBLIGATION to finish out the season and give it 100% until the commitment is over.

    The same would be said for band.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:53 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Band - in my house, it is a 4 year commitment and they know that going in at 6th grade. They must do all 3 middle school years and 2 semesters in high school, including marching band. IF after 4 years, they come to my husband and I and want to renegotiate their contract, they may. Of our 4 children that have been in our band program, thus far, only one has asked to renegotiate and we were expecting him to. He has not regretted his decision and neither have we. And this policy has not backfired on us at all.

    If your child wishes to stop band, talk to them, but make them stick it out til the end of the school year.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 3:25 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • I was in band 6 years, there are times I wanted to quit, my mom didn't let me, I am glad she didn't. They let my younger brother quit but that was because he wasn't very good (even with a private tutor) and now he does drama
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 3:30 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • You should never let them quit anything they commit to, whether they like it or not, they should always honor commitment.
    older

    Answer by older at 3:35 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Whatever you do push them to stay. It's VERY important that they get that experience and that life doesn't work by having the ability to quit because they don't like something.

    When I was in highschool, I was forced to quit band because of moving and I regret it. Even If i hated the instrument! It's just a learning experience that only comes once in a lifetime.
    ChelseATX

    Answer by ChelseATX at 4:39 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • It depends why he wants to quit. If he can find other credits to fill in the ones he would lose by quitting band, then I would let him. I have made my son finish out the season but he doesn't have to continue after the season is over. I let him quit 1 thing in 14 yrs, Boy Scouts. He had horrible leaders that had no control over the kids and all the kids did was run around the room.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 6:49 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • I have always tol my 15 yr old dd that if she wants to quit band she needs to find another activity to replace it with. She's happy in band though so right now this is not an issue.
    JanetR74

    Answer by JanetR74 at 7:26 AM on Feb. 1, 2011

  • It's hard to know exactly what to do, for each child is different in their talents and wants. If you push to hard, they end up hating it and if you are too lax they end up regretting it. Find a happy medium for you and your child. Talking to the band director is also a really good thing to do. They can give you better insight on what is going on within the band, how your child is progressing and if it is something social as well.
    derosia_mama

    Answer by derosia_mama at 10:37 AM on Feb. 1, 2011

  • I don't let my children quit anything in the middle. It is giving up on something they said they would do. Neither of them are in the band, but as far as any team related thing goes, they are lettin their teammates down. Now if they want to quit and not go back next year then that would be fine with me.
    parajumper3

    Answer by parajumper3 at 12:31 PM on Feb. 1, 2011

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