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When to Smile&nod?

When it comes to in-laws giving unwanted advice i.e. the baby should start sleeping in his crib or you start feeding him cereal now of my current fave public schools are going down hill you should let me(MIL) home school him, when do you smile and nod while in the back of your head your thinking omg you are f@(king crazy and when do you put your foot down and say i am the parent i am doing things my way?

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Emilypit

Asked by Emilypit at 2:00 PM on Jan. 31, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 9 (370 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • Honestly, I think it depends on how hard-headed they are. Some people are open to discussion about why you aren't going to do things a certain way; they're actually interested in how things have changed since they were raising kids. Other people aren't open to hearing about it--it's their way or the highway, and those are the people that you just smile and nod and keep on movin'.
    vicesix

    Answer by vicesix at 2:02 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • I smile and nod a lot!!
    mompam

    Answer by mompam at 2:05 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • I say smile and nod unless its something that could be harmful.

    When DS was a baby my MIL was dead set on him having a pacifer, he just wasn't into it. I let her try to get him to take one until she brought out the honey. Then I told her how dangerous that was.
    Charis76

    Answer by Charis76 at 2:07 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • IMHO, you are the parent, and sometimes in-laws don't know where to stop. Put your foot down, you can do it without being mean and nasty, but they have to know there boundaries just like we teach our children boundaries. Remember they are in-laws and truly don't know us the way our parents do. Tell her to back off in the most respective way that you can, and if she doesn't do it, talk to your husband....let him talk to her, if that doesn't help well then it's all fine and dandy to unleash your momma bear wrath. Good Luck and Brightest Blessings.
    kitchenwitch78

    Answer by kitchenwitch78 at 2:12 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • lol, are you my long lost sister in law?

    Swear to G that is my MIL.
    Chloesmom1126

    Answer by Chloesmom1126 at 2:18 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • thats a great time to do it
    and religious advice..hooboy
    Zoeyis

    Answer by Zoeyis at 2:24 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • My mother in law was staying with us for a couple days when my son was born. I was very firm with the idea of my son only being in his bassinet when he was sleeping or it was time to sleep, i did not want him in there awake. She was so stubborn and so rude she kept taking my son from me and putting him in the bassinet wide awake and then walk away! I was furious of course and complained to my husband, who then told her that i was the mom and she needs to understand its my rules not hers and to listen to me (of course in a nicer way). I didnt say one mean thing to her, in fact i killed her with kindness but everytime she put him in there i picked him up and of course she was mad but she couldnt say to my husband that i was disrespectful to her and she couldnt say one dang word.
    Bobbysgurl

    Answer by Bobbysgurl at 2:27 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • smile and nod is always the best thing to do.

    put your foot down if they take it beyond simply giving advice... when they try to do something that you do not agree with then have hubs talk to them lovingly and kindly. Dont be mean unless they are going to harm your child. There are ways to be nice and still get your way.
    sahlady

    Answer by sahlady at 3:14 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Lol! I smile and nod. When people think their ways are best there's no changing their minds. If they started suggesting home school instead of the school I'd pick to put my kid in I'd put my foot down. I'd definitely say something then.
    myree85

    Answer by myree85 at 3:41 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • ha-- No matter what my EX-MIL says, I smile & nod -- and then just do whatever I want. When she ask's me about it -- I just smile and nod again. HA! She probably thinks I have issues -- If she ask's me that --- I will just smile and nod!
    BaileysMom476

    Answer by BaileysMom476 at 5:35 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

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