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How can I get my SO more interested in sex? adult content

My SO has had a lack of sex drive for quite a few months now. We do have sex but it's not as often as I would like. We have been together for almost a year and at first it was alot more often (as it always is in the beginning). I think he is down b/c he's out of work but does that mean we can enjoy ourselves? I would think it would make more time and energy for that. When we do it, it's usually because I'm about to burst and I text or ask him if he's up for it that night so I don't feel rejected when I try and he doesnt want to. But I want the spontanity back. I dont want to plan it out. We do get around to it once a week or every other week. Today makes 2 weeks but I texted this morning to end the streak. Once a week is OK but I would prefer twice a week and on occassion three times. Am I asking too much? I even bought a book with a bunch of new positions to try, hoping to spice it up, thinking maybe it's boring to him. I wonder if I'm just not good enough. Has anyone ever heard of practice sex? HAHA.


Asked by huntin_mama at 3:43 PM on Jan. 31, 2011 in Relationships

Level 16 (3,212 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • I don't think it is you If the TV is own it can distract me and my husband so just think if your man has a ton of things going on in his head how hard it must be for him to relax. I can get where sometimes i have too much on my mine and then my husband has trouble with pleasing me. Talk dirty! Suck on his balls, Tease him by kissing all over him, lick and suck his neck and ear. My man likes when i rub my boobs on his dick so you could try that. Sometime i massage my man like scratching his back or playing with his hair before i do what i listed above. I have no tips on how to give the BJ. I just do what i feel like doing. Use my tongue on it and lick and suck his dick with my mouth sometimes all at once while making a twisting move up and down. Good Luck!

    Answer by 1911 at 6:37 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Most men out of work feel like they lose their masculinity. They feel worthless, useless, less than a man, especially if the SO/wife is working, bringing home the money. He's dependant, not something he was brought up to be. If he brings up being jobless, assure him that it's only temporary. Things will get better. Touch him more, kiss more often, sneak into the shower with him. Mention how when he does "this" it turns you on. Tell him watching him undress turns you on.

    Answer by Kimimale at 4:03 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • it sounds like the out of work thing is bugging him. try to get him into a hobby or doing things around the house to get his self esteem up

    Answer by Mrs.L.Mita at 3:45 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Give a BJ to relax him!

    Answer by 1911 at 3:49 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Role Play. Sounds Corny, but it keeps things interesting!

    Answer by Smartin679 at 3:52 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Ok this may be TMI but I try BJs and he likes them but I have a hard time keeping the rhythm up long enough...any pointers? Sometimes he gets there but it takes forever and he claims it's because he needs to relax more and get his mind off shit but I think it's me.

    Comment by huntin_mama (original poster) at 3:53 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • Have you asked him if he thinks the sex is good?

    Answer by notjstasocermom at 3:55 PM on Jan. 31, 2011

  • We do a lot together b/c I like the outdoors like him. we go hunting together and fishing and stuff. I can get past not having it as much as I'd like if I know it's not me. I just don't want him to be less than satisfied and go looking elsewhere. I do not think he would do that. I have no reason not to trust him but once you've been cheated on you dont want it to happen again. hopefully with the warm weather cowboy jobs will open up for him.

    Comment by huntin_mama (original poster) at 4:10 PM on Jan. 31, 2011