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3 Going on 23... DIVA/Drama Queen .... I'm a single Soldier in need of some real Help

My daughter is a handful... I have no idea how to get a handle on her. I mean some of it is probably my fault since I am in the military and always going on deployments or TDYs and always moving around. I understand its hard on children not having a routine but I've been back for a year and still having problems. She has this hug I don't care attitude. Meaning not listening...throws the biggest tantrums over the silliest thing... fights me during bath/night time.... hides a sippy cup in her room from dinner (which she wont go to be with out it, and I've been trying to take it from her but she will scream for hours unless I give in (ALSO BAD ON MY PART) but its just so hard! I am a single parent in the military its tough... my hours are long and I try to give her as much attention as possible but sometimes I can't... I just don't know what to do... Plus she just wants to be left alone and slams her door and wants to play barbies in her room... she also is having problems getting alone with other children... not wanting to share...thinks everything is hers... its just a big mess! Please Help... I need some advise!

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Asked by lynn.cox22 at 1:42 AM on Feb. 1, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 9 (275 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • At this age it really is hard. My son is 4 and to get him to listen to me is like trying to pound nails into a rock! They are just hard headed and stubborn. And yes, being military makes it harder. We are a military family and while I am the primary parent as my husband is the servicemember, it is still hard with the constant changing of family dynamic and schedules and moving time and time again. You have to find what works best, maybe time outs will work but you have to stick to them! I have found with my son that taking toys away or not being able to watch his cartoons or going to playgroups helps us most. Sticking to your "punishments" will help most. They have to learn they will not get away with the bad behavior.

    Answer by ILoveCade at 2:06 AM on Feb. 1, 2011

  • Honey, you have to realize that not only are you dealing with the "delightful 3's", but she is also dealing with some separation anxiety! I am sorry that you are a single parent, because the poor little girl probably doesn't understand what you do, and why you are going away when you do! You have a lot of making up to do! And I know it's hard, I can't imagine working all day, hard long hours, and coming home to deal with a baby. Because that's what she still is, and you just have to figure out a way to make her know how much you love her. Sit down with her some time and play barbies with her. You can learn alot about what she is thinking by listening and following her lead Really try to break down those walls shes building, and let her know that no matter where you are, she is in your heart. Make sure she has plenty of pictures of the two of you together, and maybe make her a tape with some goodnight songs for next time.

    Answer by MamaAlice54 at 2:25 AM on Feb. 1, 2011

  • Her sippy cup seems to be her security blanket. She'll quit when she is ready. Maybe you could see if she wants to take a glass of water to bed with her, just offer the option. Or make a deal that she can have her sippy cup, with water only when she goes to bed. Tell her that you want her to have pretty teeth when she grows up, so she can't have anything else that might decay her teeth during the night. God bless you Mama, and thank you for the job you are doing for our country!

    Answer by MamaAlice54 at 2:29 AM on Feb. 1, 2011

  • We are taking a parenting class at church right now. They say the most important things arae establishing boundaries, making sure your child understands the boundaries and what will happen if she crosses those, and then being consistant. I realize that those may be hard to do when you are away, but you need to make sure she understands that when she is with you, this is how things are going to be.

    Answer by Momma24Cuties at 10:20 AM on Feb. 1, 2011

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