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How to deal with over protective father of step son?

Husband is so over board about his son, that I can not even ask him to stop slurping on a soda without my husband getting mad. He says it is nothing and not hurting any one so leave him alone. Problem to me is he underminds me as the step mom teaching son that he dosen't have to listen to any thing I say. When it is just my step son and me we get along great. I say no jumping on the furniture and he stops. Husband is around and he jumps on the furniture it is an issue. I am trying to figure a way to best deal with my husbands guilt of not being there for his son while his mother was abussing him and letting him run the house. Now that he is 11 she can not controle him and put blame on husband and child for the bad behavior.

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Asked by kathranehunt at 4:18 PM on Feb. 1, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • Ask him if his son lived with him full time if it would be acceptable. If the answer is no, let him know that as he is still the father, he needs to set boundaries for his son, as that is a father's job. My mom went through this with her husband for many years.

    Answer by layh41407 at 4:21 PM on Feb. 1, 2011

  • Well, I think my problem now is that our set son lives with us full time now and still no baundries ro a fallow through with them happens. Some times the little things are the ones that make me wont to pull my hair out and just leave. Love them both but some times enough is enough.
    Thank you for the help. May be, if I can learn to reword statements to my husband he will not feel so deffensive.

    Comment by kathranehunt (original poster) at 4:29 PM on Feb. 1, 2011

  • You have to sit your husband down and talk to him like you did here.
    And may even look into family counseling.

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 4:42 PM on Feb. 1, 2011

  • Both of you go to a counselor to hash it out....

    Answer by Anna92464 at 6:35 PM on Feb. 1, 2011

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