Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

What would you do if your mother-in-law did this to you?

My bf and I have been together for 3yrs now and have a 9month old together. He dated this girl over 7yrs ago and she is 5yrs younger than he is. This girl cheated on him very badly and used him and his whole family for whatever it was she needed from them. My mother-in-law to be has been talking with this girl telling her what a loser I am and that she wants her and her son to get back together. This girl is even invited to his brothers up coming wedding. My bf says just to ignore all this but he doesn't know the lastest as to what she is saying behind my back. Not very nice as she is so sweet to my face. What would you all do? Should I confront the mother? I don't want to ruin my bf's relationship with his mother as it is his family!! I'm mean really I have never done anything to this woman at all. I love her son very dearly and wouldn't never do anything to hurt him.

Answer Question

Asked by newlifewith3 at 4:18 PM on Feb. 2, 2011 in Relationships

Level 5 (67 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • I would try to talk to her calmly, if that doesn't work tell you man to man up. He shouldn't let his mom say such things about you. As for the ex, who ares if she is going to his brothers wedding, she may be their friends. Just ignore her at the wedding.

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 4:20 PM on Feb. 2, 2011

  • Who's been telling you that she's been talking behind your back?

    Answer by CABlonde at 4:21 PM on Feb. 2, 2011

  • I would talk to my BF again and tell him how you feel. See if he is willing to talk to him mom and let her know that there is no way he is getting back together with his EX. It is a hard place to be in and after being married for 14 years and having a MIL that doesn't like me, I would tell you to just let it go. If your BF is not going to get back together with his EX and he loves you then he will figure out a way to talk with his mom.

    Good Luck!

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 4:22 PM on Feb. 2, 2011

  • My hairdresser that is friends with the ex that doesn't know that she is friends with me. Plus other people in this small town that know me have said a few things. This is been going on for awhile now. I just thought it stopped is all. Apparenetly not. As for being friends with them she isn't. The only reason why she got invited was the mother wanted her there. She controls her one son to a tee!!

    Comment by newlifewith3 (original poster) at 4:24 PM on Feb. 2, 2011

  • Well if my BF new she was doing this I would expect HIM to stick up for ME. I would never committ to a man who couldn't stand up for me.

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 4:25 PM on Feb. 2, 2011

  • My Mother-inLaw is just as screwed up!!! Let her have the ex, and move on with your life... things are so much better without the drama and BS, trust me!!!

    Answer by MommaClark3 at 4:28 PM on Feb. 2, 2011

  • I would talk to my BF and if he was completely unwilling to stand up for me i would re-evaluate a few things about my relationship. There are always difficulties but allowing your family to hurt the person you care about is not something that is good. I wish you the best and i truly hope things get better.

    Answer by CEGrissim at 4:30 PM on Feb. 2, 2011

  • That was my exact story with my ex. Except i married him, and it got worse. I tried talking to him about it, but he kept saying i was misunderstanding her. When i talked to her, she would turn it around. Finally, after years of her abuse, i confronted her everytime she said something, and when she made underhanded commments whispered in my ear at family events, i confronted her outloud, then and there. At least she couldn't say it was a misunderstanding? She was so abusive, even her own family was disgusted. Her husband and kids used to apologize to me all the time. In the end, she was a contributing factor in our divorce. The other factor was that, in the end, he was jsut as emotionally and verbally abusive as she was. And the woman she wanted him with....he's married to now. ok by me, now i have a great husband and in-laws.


    Answer by boobarandbell at 4:36 PM on Feb. 2, 2011

  • I will confront his mother get it off ur chest trust u wl feel better...

    Answer by smiley745 at 4:44 PM on Feb. 2, 2011

  • If this man will not stand up to his mother on your behalf, get out now

    Answer by rkoloms at 5:09 PM on Feb. 2, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.