Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Should I be insulted?

My friend and I were talking and her fiance wants her to be a sahm after they are married and have children and then she told me she just has bigger dreams than to sit at home and take care of kids all day.

I just kept my mouth shut. I'm a sahm and prefer it that way. My husband and I both like that I stay home with the kids and I probably always will. I don't think it's a little dream to want to be home to raise a family. My husband makes enough money to keep us comfortable and we can save and pay our bills.

Should I readdress this or just leave it alone? Honestly, it kind of rubbed me the wrong way, she made it sound like I was living a pathetic life. At least it did to me. Maybe I'm too negative? lol What do you all think?

 
marine_wife0520

Asked by marine_wife0520 at 1:52 PM on Feb. 3, 2011 in Relationships

Level 17 (3,548 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • I would kind of be insulted too, but I dont think I would take it personally. I would have addressed it at the time it was said. As of now, I say leave it be. Not worth the bs it might cause. Lol. ;)
    xxMasonsMommaxx

    Answer by xxMasonsMommaxx at 1:54 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • I take her statement to mean that she is talking about herself and how she wants to live her life. I don't think she meant for it to sound like an insult to you and you choosing to be home. I think she and her fiance are not on the same page, his 'dream' is for her to be a SAHM and her 'dream' is to do other things (not be a SAHM) and I think she is just expressing to you her feelings on his statement. I do hope that your friend will talk to her fiance and that she will do what she feels works best for her, and her family.

    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 2:01 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • I personally wouldn't take offense to it. If she is truly your friend, she probably didn't mean it the way it sounded. I think she just meant she had a different dream, than yours. Does that make sense? IMO she must have meant DIFFERENT not BIGGER. Do you think that's what she meant?
    mommy_jules

    Answer by mommy_jules at 2:01 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • Just leave it alone. I don't think she meant anything by it. She was just meaning that being a SAHM isn't for her.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 1:53 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • Nobody has the right to insult another person because we are all human beings.
    Marydoll

    Answer by Marydoll at 2:00 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • I'm completely content being a SAHM, some women aren't. Don't be offended, she simply wants something different from her life. Personally, I feel like being a mom is the most important job of all and it's why I had children.
    Orionsgirl

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 2:04 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • You should only be insulted if you choose to be. People that have never had kids will never know what it's like to have them. I think she's just not ready to be a SAHM. Some people never want to be or never will be. To each their own. If she wants to work when they have kids then great.
    I would only bring up how it made you feel. But I don't think there's a reason to feel bad about it unless you feel bad about it? lol
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:06 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • Try to keep in mind that she was talking about herself. She probably didn't even consider that you are a SAHM. Having grown up being told that my generation was supposed to save the world and girls can do and be anything they want, the reality of SAHM really is lacking in fame and glory. It is not a put down of those of us who stay home. It is the reality of working behind the scenes for hugs and kisses.
    LoveMyDog

    Answer by LoveMyDog at 2:10 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • Awwwww all you ladies made perfect sense :) thanks... it definitely makes hanging out with her tonight much easier! lol
    marine_wife0520

    Comment by marine_wife0520 (original poster) at 2:10 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • That's only an insult if you take it as an insult. Being a SAHM is not for everyone, and sometimes people don't know how to express their feelings about it. If you are secure in what you are doing and it is the right fit for your family then by all means, do what is best for your family and don't sweat the comments!
    mamax4our

    Answer by mamax4our at 2:15 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN