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Why in the world?

Why in the world would any mother stay with her husband when her husband cheated on her an have a third chils as well? My mother came back home from vacation earlier than what my dad expected. I was only 2 1/2 ,my mother was still pregnant with my brother. my mother saw an unusual car in the driveway. by the time mom turned her car around on side road and drove into driveway the car was gone. Mom said she stayed with Dad because she thought she could forgive dad because she still loved him. She didn't believe in raising kids with only one parent. Hello! he cheated on you! from what i was told there was other incidents he was seen at the skating rink also with same girl before they were married. I really have a hard time believing that Dad would cheat on her. It just sseems to good to be true for as much as he always loved her. She waited until they were married 29 years before divorcing him. I'm trying to make sense of all this. she is re-married. It is very awkward for me.

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diamondsarecool

Asked by diamondsarecool at 2:54 PM on Feb. 3, 2011 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,942 Credits)
Answers (16)
  • You never know what you will do in a situation until you are in it.
    zebbiebug

    Answer by zebbiebug at 2:56 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • If you want answers then talk to her. Women stay with cheaters for all kinds of reasons, sure most of us don't understand but sometimes love is blind. Some women can't see past they scum bag that some men are or they are hoping they will change.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 2:57 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • Well, I would be more asking why he cheated.. There is a great book called Have a New Husband by Friday, I think it would help answer your question better than anyone here can. Love is blind, but sometimes people love each other but lose their way of expressing it in other than doing the laundry and dishes.
    kbishop8688

    Answer by kbishop8688 at 3:00 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • Sometimes parents want to do the right thing and in the end its a soul eating journey to do the right thing cheating is harder to forgive if it keeps happening. And maybe he did love her just not enough to stop cheating.
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 3:04 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • devil miniyes it boggles my mind when people stay with their s/o after an infidelity. cheating is the ultimate no-no imo and i will never trust my s/o if he cheats. when someone cheats they put me at risk for contracting any kind of STD or even worst an incurable one that could ruin the rest of my life like HIV OR HERPES. the cheater is playing Russian roulette with my life plain and simple! anyone who plays RUSSIAN roulette with my life is not worth having. But a lot of people see it differently; they say "i love him" , lets work it out for the kids, blah, blah, etc. no thanks.

    gwen20

    Answer by gwen20 at 3:07 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • This isn't about you. Your parents need to deal with their marriage, even if that means divorce. Don't make it any harder on them than it is.
    Marwill

    Answer by Marwill at 3:07 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • Some women are stupid that's why.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:10 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • As an outsider. You honestly have no idea what the deep details of your parents relationship were/are. Someone cheating doesn't always have to be the end of a relationship. Sometimes it is, true, but not always. How cheating affects the overall relationship is dependent on the two people in that relationship. Cheating rarely has anything to do with "love". Either lack of "love" for the marital partner, or love for the affair partner. In most cases, cheating is more about needs, than love. Needs not being met, or fulfilled. Being unsatisfied with oneself or the marriage itself. You have no idea what "needs" of your father's (or your mother's) that weren't being met. You really have no idea what you parents may have done after infidelity to rebuild, or not. Infidelity is far more than, "my husband had sex with someone else", it's runs much deeper than that.
    pixie_trix

    Answer by pixie_trix at 3:14 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • my favorite thing is when a chick has a bf or dh and he cheats, beats, and is just plain douch to her, its always, "but i looooove him!!!"
    how stupid! u don't love him. you love the fact that he you don't do anything-he won't let you- and he pays for everything. now im talking about the ones i see on maury. i love that show. but anyways, as for just cheating, women have no self respect anymore!
    mama2bof2

    Answer by mama2bof2 at 3:14 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

  • She could've been putting up a front all these years of being able to accept it. Now that you kids are out of the house she probably had. had enough and just wanted out. You have to talk to her about why she did what she did. Honestly, I don't care if there are kids involved or not. If my husband can't be faithful to me then he doesn't deserve me.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 3:21 PM on Feb. 3, 2011

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