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Can they get a restraining order against the mom?

My parents have taken care of my 8 year old nephew since he was born. My sister has been in and out of prison for years and they have sole custody and guardianship and always have. She has never taken a interest in him at all. She came to visit tonight and got into a fight with my mom because my mom rented a movie for him. She told her own son that she hated him, that she wish she had aborted him or strangled him when he was a baby. She called him all kind of horrible names, threw a toy at his head, and said she was going to break his leg. My dad had to physically throw her out of the house tonight. My daughter who is 5 and her cousin witnessed all of this. Do you think my parents can press charges and get a restraining order against her for this? It's not the first time its happened either. I have cried and cried tonight for my nephew and I feel so horrible for him. What can be done?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:26 AM on Nov. 16, 2008 in General Parenting

Answers (14)
  • I took him to my house tonight for a sleepover to help him feel a bit better, and also to give my parents some time too. My mom is so stressed over all of this and she is in her 60's and I am worried about her too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:28 AM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • It is considered abuse and i would imagine it would be grounds for some type of legal action. Since she doesn't have legal guardianship and is obviously unfit, I would definitely think something could be done about it. Contact your local police or an attorney. If you or your parents do not have a family attorney on retainer, a lot of them will do free consults.
    Mom1Stepmom1

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 1:33 AM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • Yes, and I, to get started, report what happend tonight. They need to have documentation that she is an unsafe person and needs to stay away. Doing any violent act in front a child is considered child abuse (at least in my state)
    It sounds to me that they need to go to court to severe her parental rights too. She does not deserve him and doesnt deserve to call herself his mother IMO.
    That poor little boy, I am sooo sorry your family is going through this by the way. I pray things will get better for you.
    perksmom

    Answer by perksmom at 1:36 AM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • They need to call the police every time she does something. They need to have it documented.  By your dad putting his hands on her she could have him arrested for domestic abuse in some states. 

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:40 AM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • Anon makes a very good point. Should she see this coming and file a complaint through the police on your father before they can file a report regarding the incident, it may cause more problems for your parents. They need to report every single incident that occurs with her so that the record is there for a judge to determine the severity of the issue.
    Mom1Stepmom1

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 1:43 AM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • That is a good idea ladies. I really just hope they are able to do something so that she is not allowed to be around him again. I am worried that hearing his mom say those things will be harmful to him in the future. I mean I just cannot imagine your own mother saying those things to you! She also has a 2 yo daughter whom she dotes on, so he already feels ackward that his mom cares for her and not him. It is such a sad situation.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:50 AM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • I think that perhaps some counseling may help him, but he has a huge support group, obviously, so he should pull through OK. In fact, he will probably be a stronger adult for it. And I think that children that have other people around to help care for them besides or in addition to their parents have more confidence because they feel more loved. At a certain point he will realize that his grandparents didn't need to take him in and that you didn't have to help support them and in turn, him. But knowing that you did means that you loved him enough to choose to be there for him.
    Mom1Stepmom1

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 1:54 AM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • I would start with getting an order of protection against her. Call the police and find out how to go about it in your area. Not sure if your parents should get one or if they can get one for your nephew since he is a minor. Once you have the order of protection in place I would ask someone in the family court system what should be done. Your nephew defiantely needs to be protected from her. Sounds to me like she is really unstable and needs so serious help. Good luck
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:38 AM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • Call the police and make a report and get a restraining order immediately. She threatned her child so your mom should have no trouble getting one.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 9:00 AM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • Your dad was throwing her out of HIS house. She was on HIS property acting like that. When and if they call law enforcement, they need to be upfront and tell them about that. I don't think anything will happen to your dad. He was doing that to protect the child. But they need to do it ASAP. Something CAN be done.
    eyef0undnem0

    Answer by eyef0undnem0 at 11:14 AM on Nov. 16, 2008

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