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3 Bumps

Sepeation from hubby

I left my husband the beging of the summer, our baby was 3 months old, and money was tight, he was being a huge ass, making threats to me, calling me names infront of our 4 year old....pretty much had NO respect for me what so ever, it all flared up with the baby was born, I wasnt working and we could make it by, but he started drinking alot of beer, which is very expensive.
so I have been gone for 5 months ish, it seems he has made an effort he is seeing a councler and "says" he has quite drinking. he says he has relized his mistake, you know the song and dance.
we talk on the phone as friends and i listen to him carefully to what he says, i would think if he did make some type of change, his attitude would change, how he talks about people, yada yada yada, i would be able to tell.
well now im to a point where i could see this working, but not really sure where to go from here, his councler has invited me to go along to one of his sessions. i guess that would be the start? maybe a dinner date?
and then to add on top of it all, im staying at my parents, which of cource have reservaions about him now, i cant blame them. if we did end up having to get back together he would have to work on the relationship he has with my parents as well....ugh i know this is alot, and its very late, soooo im not sure if this all makes sense....
1.give hubby a chance?
2.how can he fix relationship with my rents....

Answer Question
 
wifecombs

Asked by wifecombs at 1:21 AM on Feb. 5, 2011 in Relationships

Level 14 (1,606 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • go to the counseling sessions and see where it goes
    tortkey

    Answer by tortkey at 1:25 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • I'm glad to hear he is in counseling that is huge. Give him credit. He must really want his family back. As far as your parents I'm sure he can slowly earn their trust back. It takes time. No relationship is perfect. Praying your marriage will be restored
    JCRestoredme

    Answer by JCRestoredme at 1:31 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • Im just sooo afraid of things going back to the way they were before, i refuse to put up with that bull.
    wifecombs

    Comment by wifecombs (original poster) at 1:34 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • My husband and I went to marriage counseling when we were having a lot of problems. On the verge of divorce. Try the counseling. If your marriage stays strong and he treats you right then the trust will come back from your parents.
    ShanAtoZ

    Answer by ShanAtoZ at 1:37 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • counseling. You need to go together, even if you continue to live apart, to see whether the relationsihp can really be repaired. If it can, the same counselor can help you work with your parents (what to say, how to say it, what to do) to repair THAT relationship.
    Belovedmoonpixi

    Answer by Belovedmoonpixi at 1:40 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • counseling will be good if that is what you want as well as what he wants. You have to WANT it to work for it to work .
    Concider yourself lucky, I wish my xhusband would have done counseling. Now hes locked up hah
    good luck to you guys
    JacesMommy04

    Answer by JacesMommy04 at 1:53 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • you seem strong so im sure you wouldnt put up with his shit. counseling might help just make sure you and the kids are happy and safe
    Jnc91

    Answer by Jnc91 at 2:22 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • Go to counseling and see where it goes. The worse that will happen is that you get back together and he returns to his old habits. Just keep that in mind and have an exit plan if things go south again. Don't worry about your parents. You don't need their approval to make adult decisions. If things work out for you and your husbands your parents will come around.
    bjane01

    Answer by bjane01 at 7:39 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • Get and read BOUNDARIES IN MARRIAGE by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend. It will help to answer the questions that you have.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:06 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • thankyou!
    wifecombs

    Comment by wifecombs (original poster) at 10:21 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

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