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I never understood and now i know why. How can i help? adult content

I always thought my sister was just bad growing up..my mom always would tell me after i left that she would run away and stuff...etc.. my sister and i got to talking last night and she told me that she will always resent my mom because she "made" her prostitute her body. I asked her what she meant and she said that my mom would not allow her to come in the house to sleep or eat therefore my sister was forced to turn tricks just to be able to buy food so she could eat. i began to shake so bad because this was all to familiar for me. My mom was just as ugly to me. She would not enroll me in school after i moved in with her and instead took me to find a job. i thought it was kind of cool but then she didnt want to take me to work anymore, she started making me walk. i had men in taxis coming up to me asking if i needed a ride and of course, the vulnerable teen i was thought sure. i was pushed into having sex with a 30 something year old man at age 16. i told my mom how scared i was to walk but never told her what happend. she would never listen. my mom made me go to work in order to live in her house and i had to walk every day to that bus stop..and every day that same cabby would drive to me. i felt like i had to go with him..i was scared to tell him no. I've been able to forgive my mom. my sister hasnt. I was able to get out and do something for myself. My sister has fallen back on my mom many times. she has seen many doctors. All i can do is tell her to let the past go. She may have had it harder than me with my mom though and it may be harder for her because somehow now she depends on my mom so much. sorry i had to get this off my chest. maybe it shouldve been a journal.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:21 AM on Feb. 5, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • Are you the the position to have your sister live with you? So she can get away from your mom? That way, she could *hopefully* find real work, and NOT have to fall back into that kind of life. And the two of you could help each other out. You help her more, but you know. It sounds like she desperately needs to get away from your mom, but just can't, or won't, on her own. This is horrible. I can't imagine. I didn't have the best childhood, but nothing like this. Your sister would probably be better off in a homeless shelter then living with the woman that did this to her!
    Raine2001

    Answer by Raine2001 at 9:27 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • Wow! mom is poisonous.. sorry you and your sister went through that .
    miritrose

    Answer by miritrose at 9:27 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • my sister and i don't always get along. we actually fight a lot...but i do think now that i know this i can be more understanding
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:39 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • This is just awful. Can't imagine it being easy now for you, or anything, Statistically many many other women had to do such stuff probably because they had no knowledge of options if any were even available back then. It seems that your mom was more than you know, I mean that she isn't probably far from that in her childhood either. I feel that there is much more to this but then all of us have skeletons in closets.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:45 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • anon, poster ...I feel you had to bury so many years of emotions. I just know God had to be blessing you all the while, even though it didn't work out the nicer version of what should have been. I was in some similar times, and I prayed all the while, knowing worse was possible.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:49 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • now the question of your title, how can you help. Just ''talk to her, more often, '' let her be aware that you were just as beat up inside, you were children !!!! You didn't know anything was happening you could control, and the world wasn't offering any answers.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:51 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • Battered women's shelter aren't just for wives who are abused by husbands. Your sister should not be living under the same roof as your mom. She can get the help she needs at a shelter.  (If she's under 18, contact the division of youth and family services in your area.  That what you and your sister should have done as kids.)

    JSD24

    Answer by JSD24 at 10:24 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • Your sister needs someone to protect her from your mom, its scary when the enemy is your own family get on the phone and find her one of those teen shelters for homeless people they will ask no questions and provide her with services. Google it and GL Momma
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 10:37 AM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • no, my sister is an adult now. with children of her own. she just has issues.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:49 PM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • Why must she forgive her? It sounds like something that may take more than just a few years and it is something that your sister needs to work out in her own time. Both of you had crappy experiences and both reacted differently to them. I don't agree that your mom pushed anyone towards prostitution. I don't think she was a good mom, but a lot of people call what she did, tough love. Unfortunately, it backfired on you both. Let your sister have her feelings. It is the kindest thing you can do.
    lilangilyn

    Answer by lilangilyn at 4:55 PM on Feb. 5, 2011

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