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Is it fair game to start a relationship with my first love's best friend?

It sounds wrong, I think. But my first love which was 15 years ago, has a best friend, who has been interested in me since then. I never get involved back then, because I thought it was wrong. Is it still wrong now, even though my first love is married with kids? Let me say that first love means he was my first love and the first guy I ever slept with.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:06 PM on Nov. 16, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • You know the RULE. You don't date your EX's friends or brothers,or other family members. I don't think their is a time limit on that.

    Answer by louise2 at 4:09 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • see that is what I thought. There is an unspoken rule. I would be seen as a sl-- right? I am just asking because that is what I thought. But the best friend tells me that the past is the past and that his best friend said it was ok.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:11 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • I see your point but isn't that still high schoolish? I don't know... but when in doubt...don't do it. Now that's a rule you can live by.

    Answer by happy2bme7 at 4:15 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • Guys will say anything to get you in the sack

    Answer by louise2 at 4:15 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • it has been 15yrs honey. I think you should go for it. Your ex is happy and you should be as well. If you 2 really like each other then go for it.

    Answer by jessicamelia83 at 4:17 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • It's fifteen years ago...doesn't that rule have a statute of limitations?
    Serioulsy, are they still BFs? Do they socialize? How will you/he/your ex and his wife all feel about that? If you are all mature adults, and there is no uncomfortable problem, then why not go for it?

    Answer by companygoddess at 4:18 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • Seems to me that 15yrs is plenty of time for him to be "fair game", but it would probably still bother you because you would be thinking if it was the right thing to do.If he makes you happy and that's what the both of you want then go for it, it could end up being the best decision you made.Who knows, but don't let the past hold you back from something you want, like you said you EX is married, so live your life with no regrets!!

    Answer by Sarah0306 at 4:19 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • If all else fails, talk to your ex about it. I know he's happy, but it could give you some closure and could enable you to move on.

    My situation is a crazy one. I married a man who was married to two women (different times) that I knew. I was friends with one from the time I was a small child, and the other I knew since jr. high. It was awkward at first, but all have come to terms with it and accepted it. They lost him, and how he's mine! I couldn't be happier.

    My point is, go for it. 15 years is a long time, and I would think your ex would be happy for you. But like I said, if all else fails, talk to the ex and get his input.

    Answer by rhope4 at 4:28 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • i think if their still friends, then the rule still applies. BUT if they've since drifted apart (15 years is a long time) then i don't see a problem with it. Since their best friends their probably similar and your attracted to the same qualities that attracted you to your first love in the first place.

    Answer by Pudge_Pie20 at 5:10 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • Actually they are still very good friends.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:53 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

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