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Answers / Life & Home / Relationships
3 Bumps

What have i done?

MY husband and i just had a big fight and i know i was wrong how do i fix it? this is what happen while i was getting a ped i text my bf who is a guy and my hubby knows of him cause we in the same church." i said hi i know you're busy i was texting to say hi get home safely luv you".the problem is i accidently text it to my husband he text me back and ask what kind of crap was that and i said my bad i was texting so and so not knowing he was upset anyway he called saying you better come home right now cause m gonna call your pastor cause you getting out of hand so i finish my ped went home he was in the dr he told me to sit down which i did he started saying what kind of text was that so i kindly told him it was innocent i married him cause i love him i said you have trusting issue and you need to fix it and i got up he then grab me by my shoulder where he scratch me and he throw me o the chair i was in shock tears wanted to come out my eyes but i held it back. he was so mad to the point he thought about killing me he said how can he trust me now? but i would never cheat on this man and the text was innocent he said he will never step a fooot in the church anymore and that he wish me luck m thinking about sleeping on the couch tonite help me out you guys i need all your advice.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:24 PM on Feb. 5, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (17)
  • I'd call the pastor. That was a bit too intimate of a txt to a male friend. Not judging really, just giving my opinion. I see why he's angry. Let a third party (pastor) step in and help
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:27 PM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • Um excuse me but your hub just physically put his hands on you in anger and your asking us to what?  Help you apologize? He should be apologizing.  And if he said that he feels like killing you, then he's had the thought go through his head of killing you and I would suggest that he get some counceling.  Not saying that the text you sent is okay, saying I love you to another man would not be acceptable in my house unless it was family.
    MrsHouston47302

    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 8:27 PM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • damage done gl
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:28 PM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • When he put his hands on you he instantly became at fault. Maybe you should worry less about fixing it and more about what to do about having a husband that will grab you`up by the shoulders and throw you over a chair.
    mandaday

    Answer by mandaday at 8:30 PM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • Has he ever had issues with your guy friend before? How long have you been friends with this guy? Does hubby know him? Has he ever been physical like this before? I think I would wait for things to calm down and try to talk to your hubby about this insecurity thing. If he get angry and physical like this again, call the police and file a report. That is not acceptable.
    huntin_mama

    Answer by huntin_mama at 8:31 PM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • I agree w/admckenzie!
    PatriciaofMN

    Answer by PatriciaofMN at 8:32 PM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • We have been bf over 8 yrs i would never told him i love him if i honestly knew theres something wrong with it. i was in a abusive relationship when i was in my 20's and the minute he grab me all the bad memories came back to me i never thought my husband would put his hands on me he shock me tonight
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:38 PM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • That was an innocent text, ya maybe it was taken the wrong way but your husband is abusive. Get out now before it gets worse and worse. Yes, sleep on the couch and call your pastor. Tell your pastor your husband put his hands on you like that! Get help!
    JackieGirl007

    Answer by JackieGirl007 at 8:39 PM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • You were out of line to begin with. He was out of line to touch you. Talk to the pastor. Get some marriage counseling.
    ShanAtoZ

    Answer by ShanAtoZ at 8:51 PM on Feb. 5, 2011

  • I know I'd have been PISSED if I saw my husband had text another woman that. I also don't think its right for spouses to have a best friend of the opposite sex. Your best friend should be your husband, not another man. While I don't agree with your husband putting his hands on you, he was wrong for that, you are also wrong for being that close to another man out side of your marriage. You need to talk to your husband and back off of your friendship with this other guy.
    KWnavywife

    Answer by KWnavywife at 8:52 PM on Feb. 5, 2011

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