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Expectations.....reasonable and unreasonable?

Have you ever asked your s/o or dh to write out a list of expectations between the two of you?
What do both of you expect out of each other? What are each others responsibilities in your relationship?

I've asked my husband to do this on many occasions and he never wants to. Do you think he's afraid of being responsible for a "list"?
I don't think it's an outrageous thing to ask......I want to know what he needs/expects from me as well.

This is coming from a relationship that is one sided.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:21 AM on Feb. 6, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Nope, never have. Because we focus on the needs of the other, there is no feeling of resentment. he takes care of my needs without asking and I take care of his needs.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 11:24 AM on Feb. 6, 2011

  • Obviously, he expects that the relationship remains one-sided. Sorry, I know it sounds harsh. The best advice I can offer is to change your approach, and also to stop allowing one-sidedness in the relationship.

    Answer by misses_nick at 11:25 AM on Feb. 6, 2011

  • Writing them out is a good idea if you are having conflict over expectations. My DH and I have never really had to have that conversation, I'm pretty lucky - but I know lots of couples that have. It's good for a relationship to have ample communication, especially when it comes to expectations.

    Answer by Scuba at 11:27 AM on Feb. 6, 2011

  • those expectations should be discussed and agreed upon before you become too serious....saves a whole lot of time.

    Answer by gwen20 at 11:30 AM on Feb. 6, 2011

  • Write yours out first and let him read them. He may just not know or be afraid of telling you what his needs are for fear that they are too much or that he will be embarrassed. Maybe once he sees yours he will feel more comfortable listing his own.

    Answer by huntin_mama at 11:32 AM on Feb. 6, 2011

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