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STEP-DAUGHTER

MY STEP-DAUGHTER IS 8 YRS OLD AND HER FATHER AND I HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 4 YRS WE NOW HAVE A CHILD TOGETHER THE PROBLEM IS SHE WILL NOT AND DOES NOT LISTEN TO ANY THING I SAY TO HER AND IS GETTING WORST HOW DOES SOMEONE DEAL WITH THIS HELP!!!!!!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:48 PM on Nov. 16, 2008 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (6)
  • Do you not get a long? You should perhaps enlist the help of her father in this, maybe he needs to be more forceful with her.
    bubblycute

    Answer by bubblycute at 7:51 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • I have been a step-mother and after my divorce my child had a step-mother so I've been on both sides of the fence. My experience has taught me that step-parents shouldn't be put in the position of disciplining the step-children. That should be the responsibility of the biological parent. I know Dr. Phil talks allot about this issue, you might want to check out his website and read some of the stuff he says.

    Unfortunately, allot of men leave these issues up to their new wives so it gets them off the hook with the kid/kids. Dad gets to be the good guy and step-mom is the bad guy. Dad gets to not feel guilty or anything.

    They didn't make up the Wicked Step-mother character for nothing.
    pugpin

    Answer by pugpin at 7:56 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • I have an 8 year old daughter and have the same problem - especially with her listening to my SO. He has been really tough on her making her answer (consequence) for each and every infraction...It was very tiring and tough, but she has since become a much better behaved child. She is my strong-willed, middle child syndrom kid and because of that I think that she is more prone to "test the boundarys". I have had this trouble with her since she was old enough to say the word no and mean it! Be tough, don't give in - even when it seems you can't do it anymore...she needs to know who is in charge and that it is NOT her! If you do this, she will learn the ultimate lesson and this is the most valuable thing she could learn in life.

    *cont'd*
    Babylove76

    Answer by Babylove76 at 8:18 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • *cont'd*

    MAKE SURE that you AND her father both agree and back each other in front of her! This united front will save you TONS of heartache and frustration. My SO never ever does anything without us being a united front to the kids. This is so important to the kids especially in a blended family! Good luck!!
    Babylove76

    Answer by Babylove76 at 8:18 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • Daddy needs to step up and put little on in her place. I don't care if you are a stranger off the street. She should RESPECT EVERYONE. That is the #1 rule in my house. Set expectations for all the children in the house, have them work out consequences for not achieving the exepectation. Post them where they can see it and there you go. There is this book I swear by. It is for school teachers but it can easily be adjusted for home use.
    Ron Clark- 55 essentials...buy it, live it
    BoobooHealer

    Answer by BoobooHealer at 1:36 PM on Nov. 17, 2008

  • I'm a step mom.And I married him when she was 4 too.She was the same way with me until her daddy started to back me up.I would take priviledges away like tv,games, and such.It took a long time, but she finally got the idea.But it didn't work until me and her daddy became a united front.You never really know what her mother says about you when they are alone.That may be part of it.
    evelynwest

    Answer by evelynwest at 1:37 PM on Nov. 17, 2008

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