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Does you SO/Hubby do this??

My 10 year old is bipolar, ODD and ADHD. He causes our home a lot of stress. He is always fighting with and is generally making our life hard.

My hubby is the only person that I can talk to about the stress... When I talk about how upset I feel, my hubby will get mad. He will tell me that I am making it out to be about me. It's like I'm suppose to be this rock that has no emotions. Dealing with my son is much harder on me and he'll say he knows this. But just turns into a major a$$ if I need a friend to talk to. It just blows my mind.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:23 AM on Feb. 7, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Is your husband bipolar? It may be more than just your son who has a problem.
    ladymomtraveler

    Answer by ladymomtraveler at 6:25 AM on Feb. 7, 2011

  • Have you though about counseling/therapy? It's nice talking to someone who isn't going to make you feel like crap about your emotions.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 6:38 AM on Feb. 7, 2011

  • I guess I need to pay someone to talk to. It's a good idea.... there is no love here.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 6:42 AM on Feb. 7, 2011

  • Yes, my husband can be like that...can you afford a therapist? I have learned that if I need someone to talk to, to just see a therapist because I'm paying them to listen and listen they do....and I don't feel judged...
    Anna92464

    Answer by Anna92464 at 7:08 AM on Feb. 7, 2011

  • My 6yo is Bipolar, ODD, and ADHD also. I understand. DH doesn't understand how stressed I am because he is not usually here when she has her rages. We have therapists that come to our house 12 hours a week to work with the whole family.
    ashisamom

    Answer by ashisamom at 7:09 AM on Feb. 7, 2011

  • I have an autistic child. You need a friend since Hubby can't handle it. Let's face it, generally women are better at emotional stuff. I think the husbands sometimes think we can handle everything because we usually do. Are you getting some breaks and some time for yourself? It should be about YOU sometimes! Hugs.
    Where are you located?
    Hazelnutkin

    Answer by Hazelnutkin at 9:48 AM on Feb. 7, 2011

  • I think this problem is a prime example of the inherent differences between men and women. We women like to talk through our problems or even just talk about it to make ourselves feel more understood. Men only want to talk about a problem that they can DO something about. I feel for you, because I know this has to be SO, SO hard. It's your baby, and you want to make it better. Your DH feels the same way, he wants to fix it for your DS, but he also wants to fix it for YOU, and he can't. Is there a support group in your area? If not, can you start one? You can ask for help from a local therapist (OT or psychology dept, maybe even a local college has someone working on their PhD who would help) You can't be the only Mommy going through the same thing. Maybe giving and getting support from others will at least make you feel proactive or discover some tricks and tips from others that will help. Hang in there! You can do this!
    JawgaMom1

    Answer by JawgaMom1 at 10:07 AM on Feb. 7, 2011

  • I honestly do not think that I could look at my husband with the same loving eyes if he treated me like that... one of the main reason I love him so deeply is because of our relationship, how he is my best friend, and I can tell him anything...

    Maybe couples couseling will be a better idea to give commincation skills? Most males think they need to "fix" whatever it is instead of just listenning, it's a "guy thing"
    MommaClark3

    Answer by MommaClark3 at 12:21 PM on Feb. 7, 2011

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