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Am I wrong???

Is it wrong of me to want my husband to make me and his family his first priority? The fact that he is putting his career first makes me so mad! I actually told him I hated him tonight! He is always away with work, I never ever wanted that before but now he is doing things that make me think something else is going on. Am I wrong?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:18 PM on Nov. 16, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • No. You aren't wrong. He may be up to something. He may be using work as an escape. Or he may simply feel that by putting work first, then he IS putting his family first. I would get a counselor involved ( a MALE counselor at that ) to get the point across b/c that's what it took for my husband. We still have the work issue, but it's been better than it was before someone explained to him that being a father and husband meant more than just working. That's a small part of it. Balance is important. Your needs are more than financial as are those of your family. Some people might tell you "girl, you should be happy your man wants to work", but I know the other side of it... and it can be just as dark... Keep your head up and try to put your relationship back on track. It may take a little compromise from both of you.. but that's marriage! :o) Virtual hugs!

    Answer by AggieMamacita at 9:36 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • Sometimes husbands (especially mine's) thinks that by making more money is proving that he loves me and our children. In his mind he can never make enough money. My husband leaves the house at 5:18a.m. every morning and I do not see him until 9:30 in the evening at least 3 days a week. I know he is not cheating. He feels that he must make enough money to give me the things he feel I deserve.

    Answer by Sis.Jackson at 9:38 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • If you dont mind telling us what your husbands job is that would help... because 1) my husband went to the Police academy and it lasted 9 months. he still lived at home but when he wasnt working he was going to school FULL TIME FOR BOTH! And now he is a full time cop. ALWAYS working. And when he is working i am home and when im working he is home. i never see him but every few days... Our daughter sees us all the time but never really together. I support my man in his choice of work. Sorry if this is rude but get over it. he is working and thats alot more then some F**king men. Be happy he is trying to do something with his life....


    Answer by BallardMomma at 9:43 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • No- I think anyone would question why is my husband working long hours? If his job is the kind of job were you have to travel then it is understandable. But if he is not a Boss or in a sales position this would put up a red flag to me too. But keep in mind, things in this world today are bad and he might be working long hours to keep his job stable for you and the children. He just might be under a lot of stress right now.
    Some Signs---- worried about how he looks, body, cloths, a lot of unknown calls, hiding his phone from you,
    But I am sure it is just stress....
    Good Luck!

    Answer by getyoung at 9:50 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • Have you thought about the financial side of things. The fact that everyones jobs are on the line right now. I think you are wrong.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:26 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

  • he is army, BUT he only is a weekend warrior. Now he goes out ALL the time with the "GUYS" he drills with, he even wants to move closer to them, but I have NEVER met any of them!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:26 PM on Nov. 16, 2008

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